


Wen Junhui liked your tweet!

by celestialminghao



Series: Twitter Stan AU [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Idols, Alternate Universe - Not K-Pop Idols, Asexual Jeon Wonwoo, Coming Out, Demisexual Lee Chan | Dino, F/M, Fame, Gen, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, M/M, Past Sexual Assault, Sexuality Crisis, Texting, Twitter, Youtuber Lee Chan | Dino, cheol hao chan gyu wonu shua and kwan are the stans, seok jun soon vern jihoon and jeonghan r the idols, yuseul is still here!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-18
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-06-17 02:09:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15451062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celestialminghao/pseuds/celestialminghao
Summary: hao ~(^.^)~@stormcloudjunFUCK ALL OF YOUhao ~(^.^)~@stormcloudjunFUCK ALL MY FFUCKING FRIENDShao ~(^.^)~@stormcloudjunTHE ACUTAL DAY BEFORE THE FUCKING FANSIGN I CNAT BELIEBE ANY OF YOUhao ~(^.^)~@stormcloudjunFRIENDSHIP >:( ENDED WITH SEUNGCHEOL ! JOSHUA! SEUNGKWAN! LEE 'DOESNT KNOW HOW TO READ' CHAN! AND YUSEUL! MINGYU AND WONWOO ARE MY BEST FRIENDS NOW!! >:(((----------Resident fanboy Xu Minghao was just followed by his bias.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> aight so !!
> 
> stans: seungcheol, joshua, wonwoo, mingyu, chan, seungkwan, minghao  
> idols: jun, jihoon, vernon, seokmin, soonyoung, jeonghan
> 
> perf unit: soonyoung & jihoon & jun-leader  
> hip hip unit: vernon & soonyoung-leader  
> vocal unit: jun & seokmin & jeonghan & jihoon-leader 
> 
> seventen bc jeonghan became a trainee at 17&jihoon, soonyoung, and jun joined pledis at 17, seokmin was added the group at 17, and vernon debuted at 17. u get it... 17 is an important number to them! 
> 
>  
> 
> biases & bias wreckers  
> cheol: vernon & soonyoung  
> joshua: jeonghan & jun  
> wonwoo: soonyoung & seokmin  
> mingyu: jihoon & vernon  
> minghao: jun & seokmin  
> seungkwan: jihoon & jun  
> chan: vernon & seokmin  
> yuseul: seokmin & soonyoung
> 
>  
> 
> this is going to be short! the time skips are bigger! the entire thing, despite only being a few chapters, is over the course of a year-year and a half! 
> 
> wonwoo's asexuality (biromantic) and chan's demisexuality are still included! as are jun's and chan's assaults! there will just be more of a heavy focus around the sexualities rather than the sexual assaults! but they will be mentioned!
> 
> mingyu!! is bisexual!! this will heavily focus on his sexuality crisis and his relationship with jihoon (sorry for not including kwanhoon)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chan is a youtuber btw .. basically think flawlesskevin with the army but like carats all really like chan and think hes a sweetheart and hes a legitimate fan of svt ygm

cheolie  
@vernomchewing  
  
my love for vernon is fatherly pleas i have girlfriend

-south korea     -aug 8th

myloveforsoonyoungisntfatherly.com/

following: 583     followers: 269

 

 

 

**\----------**

 

josh  
@hancakes

"skate fast eat ass" is how i seduced ur dad

-i miss ksoo     -dec 30th

following: 361     followers: 643

 

**\----------**

  
mingyu!? no!!  
@hamsterhoshi

"i took the jihoon pc because i love him its in my heart you cant stop me"

-no     -jul 17th

archiveofourown.org/hamsterhoshi

following: 453     followers: 504

 

**\----------**

  
wonwoo?? yes??  
@kissesjihoon

"mingyu where is my woozi photocard"

-a forest bc Tree     -apr 6th

following: 319     followers: 675

 

**\----------**

  
yuseul  
@seokminniemouse

can i still dedicate my life to loving seokmin if im dating cheol

tumblr.SVT_TRANSS.com

-jpn, krn, eng, & french!!!!!     -jun 15th

following: 323    followers: 1,491

 

**\----------**

  
hao ~(^.^)~  
@stormcloudjun

juns energy is in fact not only big dick energy but also loving husband energy

-juns asshole     -nov 7th

archiveofourown.org/bluelcveliesjun

following: 632     followers: 823

 

**\-----------**

 

kwanie ~ <3  
@makemewoozi

jihoon is an uwu in the streets and a daddy in the sheets

-jeju     -jan 16th

following: 344     followers: 543

 

**\----------**

  
chanathan  
@lovinghvc

me crying about seventeen but its being filmed and way too many people watch it now why does this pay my rent

-the womb     -feb 11th

youtube.com/lovinghvc

following: 543     followers: 765.7k

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
For Why is wen fucking junhui so gorgeous i rly hope he shoots me  
  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
i rly hope my boyftiend wen junhui kicks me in the ribs lmao love u babe

 

 

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
CALL x3 JUN PLEASE RUN ME OVER IM GOING TO START CRYING MY DICK HURTS

 

 

cheolie @vernomchewing  
minghao crying over jun again... @junhui_1996 come collect ur mans

           josh @hancakes  
           @vernomchewing i have fuckinf evidence of you cring over soonyoung in a suit but go off lol

           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @hancakes yknow i dont Care if we are roomates i honestly hope you die . i never liekd u a DAY IN MY LIFE JISOO

           josh @hancakes  
           @vernomchewing sir im going to have to ask u from Refrain as i am not in blackpink SCOUPERT

           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @hancakes I WAS NINETEEN J I S O O

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
josh @hancakes  
stop askinf me why i chagned me @ its cause i finally realized my ult as no ass

 

kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
u ever have an ass to flex on yoon jeonghan?

           josh @hancakes  
           @makemewoozi delete this

           chanathan @lovinghvc  
           @makemewoozi shua hyung cant relate ;(

           josh @hancakes  
           @lovinghvc shutup chan you cant even read yet

 

chanthan @lovinghvc  
me on the 342nd day of joshua hyung making fun of me for the time i misread 'jeonghan' as the english word for 'jellybean' because i HADNT SLEPT IN FOUR DAYS BUT LIKE G O  O F F: shutup hyung yes i can read >:((

 

wonwoo?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
what up. my names chan. im 19. and i never fucking learned how to read.

           chanathan @lovinghvc  
           @kissesjihoon literal homophobia gyu hyung

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

wonwoo?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
its not fun when all your friends are lgbt and they use the homophobia joke w you, but all their followers think its serious cause youre the only straight one

           hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
           @kissesjihoon mingyu r u ok  
   
           mingyu!? no!! @hamsterhoshi  
           @stormcloudjun is he ever?

           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @kissesjihoon 'THE ONLY STRAIGHT ONE' mingyu i have a girlfriend and you want to kiss lee jihoon

           wonwoo?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
           @vernomchewing hyung youre bisexual 

           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @kissesjihoon  s t r a i g h t e r  t h a n  y o u

 

  
wonwoo?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
wanting to kiss lee jihoon doesnt make me gay it makes me a man with common fucking sense send tweet  
  
           mingyu!? no!! @hamsterhoshi  
          @kissesjihoon look at my display.  
   
           wonwoo?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
           @hamsterhoshi im moving out.

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

cheol: I AM A HETEROSEXUAL MAN WITH A GF  
cheol: I AM A CISHET  
cheol: I AM PROUD TO BE NORMAL

cheol has named the chat cishets

josh: shut the fcuk up,

cheol: .

yuseul: i love u cheolie <3 but like  
yuseul: aren't u bi 

josh: you've literally sucked my dick bye 

wonu: guys mingyu is screaming at me  
wonu: from across the apartment  
wonu: I HIGHKEY WOULDNT MIND SMOOCHING WOOZI FROM SEVENTEEN OH BOY

mingyu: ok so u just gonna put my business out there like tht

wonu: admit ur at least fucking bi i cant STAND YOU

mingyu: damn ;( wonu ;( admit ur in love with me

wonu: .

mingyu: WHY ELSE WOULD U WANT ME TO BE 'ADMITING IM BISEXUAL' when im not

wonu: bc we're going to a fanmeet tmrw and im going to tell jihoon 'my tall friend wants to kiss you and we're all pretty sure youre gay please kiss him'

hao: LMFAOOO

mingyu: MINGHAO SHUT UP YOU WANT TO SUCK JUNHUIS DICK

hao: U BET THE FUCK I DO!!!!!!!!!  
hao: omg guys i kepe rewatching call call call i actualyl want him to fuck me

yuseul: mood  
yuseul: seokmin in call x3 ohhhhhhhhhhboy  
yuseul: I know that he does this like every come back but brown hair seokmin is god tier   
yuseul: im gonna give him a kiss on the hand tmrw bet  
yuseul: ima ask first tho bc consent is #cool

cheol: seul

yuseul: ilu cheolie

cheol: i love you <33 too <33 my <333 sweet and <3 beautiful <33 girlfriend <33333

yuseul: <333333  
yuseul: seungcheol makes my heart beat so fast I love u so much 

cheol: <33

josh: disgusitng

yuseul: please be happy for me one day in my life

josh: no

chan: guys!!!!!! hey do u guys want to see the routine ive been doing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
chan: or smth is going down  
chan: i read the situation wrong

josh: well yah  
josh: u cant read

chan: why wouldi word it like that,,,

josh: bc u cant read

chan: hyung please find the nearest window and fling yourself from it

josh: yes. finally. the sweet release ive been waiting for. its my sign.

yuseul: oppa u meeting jeonghan tmrw tho

josh: ah, fuck.

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
yuseul @seokminniemouse  
joshua oppa remains to literally be my funniest friend im ogign to PISS MYSELF

           josh @hancakes  
           @seokminniemouse i think cheol is into that let me ask him  
  
           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @hancakes hey. stop breathing.

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

mingyu: anyways!!!! chan yes i want to see ur routine!!!

hao: yeah!! isnt it for lotto?

chan: yep! my mans is embarrassed by it so ! i had to bring it back !  
chan: im posting it on my yt channel

yuseul: vlog or official acc?

chan: official i want MY MANS TO S E E  I T

yuseul: GO CHAN!  
yuseul: i hope vernon sees it!

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

cheolie: ur evil

yuseul <3: vernon and i dont even rly talk anymorEEEeeeeEEEEeeeEEE  
yuseul <3: im gonna see if he recongizes me tmrw lol

cheolie: bet  
cheolie: chan will END U  
cheolie: i nearly did bc hon that my ult

yuseul <3: finally

cheolie: stop talking to joshua

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao: my dick hurts :( ugh im gonna go rewatch call x3

mingyu: wonu emergency roommate meeting

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

wonuwu: what

gyuboo: lets kick minghao out

myungho: die  
myungho: HAVE FUN LISTENING TO ME MASTURBATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

gyuboo: DIE

wonuwu: all in favor, say i  
wonuwu: i

gyuboo: i

wonuwu: minghao has to die now

gyuboo: one final nut  
gyuboo: then he perishes

wonuwu: finally

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
oh my fucking GODD FUCK ME UP!!!! FUCK ME UP WEN JUNHUI!!!!! BITCH I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!

           becca @vernsollie  
           @stormcloudjun he cant sing lol  
   
           hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
           @vernsollie OFF!!!!!!!! MY TWITTER!!!!!!! THOT!!!!!!!! FAT BLOCK!!!!!!!!!!!

  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
i would SELL MY SOUL FOR WEN JUNHUI ETERNAL HAPPINESS  
   
           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @stormcloudjun honestly i worry about you

  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
I W;;UOOLD LITE;;ERALL ..YSTAB B MUSEL;F FOR YPUR AHPPNIE;;S ..... LET ME CHOKE ON YOUR COCK SIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @stormcloudjun @junhui_1996  
  
           josh @hancakes  
           @stormcloudjun seungcheol omg ur evil lol @junhui_1996  
  
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @stormcloudjun make ur fuckin ult shame u into stoppingthis nonsense @junhui_1996  
  
           chanathan @lovinghvc  
           @stormcloudjun @junhui_1996

           yuseul @seokminniemouse    
           @stormcloudjun @junhui_1996

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

Wen Junhui has liked your tweet!

Wen Junhui has liked your tweet!

Wen Junhui has liked your tweet!

Wen Junhui has liked your tweet!

Wen Junhui has liked your tweet!

Wen Junhui has liked your tweet!

Wen Junhui is now following you!

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
FUCK ALL OF YOU

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
FUCK ALL MY FFUCKING FRIENDS

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
THE ACUTAL DAY BEFORE THE FUCKING FANSIGN I CNAT BELIEBE ANY OF YOU

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
FRIENDSHIP >:( ENDED WITH SEUNGCHEOL ! JOSHUA! SEUNGKWAN! LEE 'DOESNT KNOW HOW TO READ' CHAN! AND YUSEUL! MINGYU AND WONWOO ARE MY BEST FRIENDS NOW!! >:(((  
  
           chanathan @lovinghvc  
           @stormcloudjun was that necessary?  
  
  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
FUCK YOUUUUUUUFUCK YOU IN THE FACE WITH MY FISTSSSSSSSS  
  
  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
SIX.  S I X TWEETS GUYS. HE LIKED SIX OF MY TWEETS  
  
  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
.  
  
  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
GUYS EMERGENCY MEETING  
  
  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
IM SCARED TO DELETE THE TWEETS/BLOCK JUN BC WHAT IF I ACTUALLY GET TO SUCK HIS DICK?

 

**\----------**

 

 

Wen Junhui liked your tweet!

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
ah dammit 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao: GUUSY

cheol: omg im so sorry it was just too funny i didnt think he would actually see them and then josh did it too and i took yuseuls phone so she didnt have a say she was sleeping cause we done #fucked and kwan and chan are just stupid kids im so sorry

hao: WEN JUNHUI FUCKING FOLLOWED ME

chan: why bring up that no one thinks i can read

yuseul: WAHT HHE UFKCKC  
yuseul: WHY WOUDL HE FOLLWO YOU

hao: IDK BUT MY AO3 JUST HAD A GUEST KUDOS MY SEOKSOON FIC IM SO SCARED   
hao: GUYS GUYS WHAT THE UFKC DO I DO

josh: omg can u get me jeonghans number?

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

myungho: GUYS

gyuboo: wh

wonuwu: hey

myungho: GUYS CHEOL HYUNG TAGGED JUN IN ONE OF MY TWEETS N A BUNCH OF OUR FRINEDS DID IT TOO AND JUN SAW THEM AND LIKED ALL MY CRY LOVE TWEETS FROM TODAYAND THEN HE FOLLOWS ME I RLY WISH I WAS MAKING THIS UP IM GONNA THROWUP

gyuboo: WAHT THE UFCK

wonuwu: holy literally fucking absolute mother fuck damn shit dick fuck

gyuboo: damn

wonuwu: can you get me to meet soonyoung i want to tell him hes important and that we all love him and that he does so much for seventeen and his dedication to the group itself is so admirable and hes so breathtakingly beautiful and i hope one day he finds someone who truly appreicates him and loves him and makes me feel like the most important person in the world and it will be me we will get married and i will learn how to make flan and make him a flan

gyuboo: .  
gyuboo: can u get jihoon to sign my photocard  
gyuboo: dude why a fuckign flan

wonuwu: do you know what a flan looks like?

gyuboo: yeah?

wonuwu: imagine soonyoung eating a flan

gyuboo: omg..  
gyuboo: hamster cheeks...

wonuwu: preciesly

myungho: GUYS IM TRYING SO HARD NOT TO CRY OR THROW UP AND MY MUSIC IS STILL PLAYING AND CALL X3 IS ON AND NOW I HAVE A BONER I AM GOING TO THROW UP AND CRY ALL WHY MY DICK IS HARD I CANT BELIEVE MY LUCK TODAY

gyuboo: ..  
gyuboo: AND your ult followed you on twitter 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

mingyu: hyung i hope u know minghao is abt to pass out

yuseul: OMG please go check on him...

josh: its not that deep  
josh: honestly i think hes probably rewatching call x3 and jacking off again

wonu: i went into minghaos room and hes hyperventaliting

cheol: oh god ifeel awful...

wonu: jun dm'd him

kwan: SAVE HIM

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996

 

heyy whats up!!!  
i got a ton of mentions all for the same tweet ?? and i was curious and it was you!!! lmfao  
you seem super sweet omg <3

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao has sent an image

hao: I CANT MAKE THIS SHIT UP  
hao: HYUNG... FOR WHY............  
hao: IS IT MAKE FUN OF THE CHINESE KID DAY?  
hao: THIS IS WORSE THAN THE TIME I FORGOT THE KOREAN WORD FOR PENIS SO I SAID CUCUMER INSTEAD!

  
chan: omg ... dont ...

josh: honestly... u culd of said it in mandarin i would of translated

yuseul: suck a cucumber shua oppa

josh: ok  
josh: minghao ask jun to dm me i want to fuck jeonghan

hao: NO SHKS

josh: mingyu ill stop wonwoo from tell jihoon about your deep seeded love for him if u dm jun for me

mingyu: ok

hao: MINGYU

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996

 

heyy whats up!!!  
i got a ton of mentions all for the same tweet ?? and i was curious and it was you!!! lmfao  
you seem super sweet omg <3

hi!!  
this is so embarassing >.<  
anwyays... im minghao!!!!!!!  
youre literaly,,, my ult and i look up to you a lot? im also chinese and living in korea and im a dancer and like  
maybe one day i could be as succesful as you yknow!!???  
and then my friends tagged u in that tweet .. sorry lol..

omg no worries!!! i find tweets like those funny  
i scrolled abit thru ur account and i saw a lot of tweets in mandarin.. im assuming its  bc ur also chinese .. do u mind speaking in mandarin?

of course yea!!!!!  
tbh the only friend i have that knows the language is joshua  
but idk i feel like i should be working on my korean? idk

eh u speak it great!!!

hello

korean again?

good evening  
my name is kim mingyu, @stormcloudjun was a two hour socialogical study conducted by harvard university. we are now complete with our study. we wanted to see how dumb a carat could possibly look infront of their ultimate bias without offending said ultimate bias [shortened as 'ult'] and ruining any possible chance at said dumb carat giving said 'ult' oral sex. thank you for your time.  
if you have any questions please contact me at @kissesjihoon

wait omg minghao wants to give me head? nice

OMG NO REACTION WOW  
anyways hi im mingyu  
im sitting on minghao  
u should know he weighs like 53 kg and i weigh like 80 lol hes dead  
anyways  
can u give me jeonghans number bc my hyung said he would stop my other hyung from exposing my shamed love (no homo tho) for lee jihoon to jihoon (we're going to the fansign tmrw haha) anwyas  
shua hyung wants to fuck jeonghan? and im pretty sure he has good chances shua hyung is hot

please get off of minghao

but he'll yell at me :(  
and he'll take away the phone i wanna talk to u more  
im still in shock that ur one of my members of my literal ult group so im chill rn

ill dm u on your acc omg  
ill talk to jeonghan hyung btw lol

thanks <3 xoxox

and jihoon <3

wait no  
IM BAKC  
GOD HES LITERALLY 8CM TALLER THAN ME BUT HE HAS LIKE 30 KG ON ME ONG MY RIBS

u asked me to kick u in the ribs earlier..

YEAH YOU NOT MINGYU

wait how tall are you ?

179cm

HES SO TALL--

I KNOW  
HES A PUPPY  
A GIANT FUCKIGN P U P P Y  
I HATE HIM SO MCUHCHDKJJKDSJKDSKJDFS

he wants me to dm him

DONT DO IT

im doing it

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996

 

lol jeonghan said to give me his @

OMG....  
omg i cant he wont want to talk to hyung

whhy

he bodyshames him

what?  
tell me it

@hancakes

LMFAOOOO

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
josh: MIGNYU WAHT HTEH FUCK DID OYU OD I M GOIGN BACK TO AMEICA

mingyu:  IDDI WAHT OYU ASKED HYUNG

josh: M I NG YU KSFDKJDSJKDSJK  
josh: YOON JEONGHAN IS FUCKING TDMING ME AND ASKING WHY I COMPARED HIM TO A PANCAKEI CANT JUST TELL HIM

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyways stan stray kids


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> walks up one month late with starbucks 
> 
> h-hey guys.... 
> 
> a lot has happened in my pitiful lil life but Hey Im Back UWU

kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
n e ways we just got to the fansign n gyu hyung has been clowning minghao the whole time bc jun followed him last night

           alec @junbug  
          @makemewoozi im sorry what

 

chanathan @lovinghvc  
im gonna vlog what i can of today!! word to the wise: if anyone at some point starts crying in video its cause minghao was followed by jun last night and we arent sure if it's fully set in for him yet lol

 

lenora @galaxyvernon  
.. yall chan is evil thats all i have to say

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

josh @hancakes  
i dont want to be here but only cause yoon jeonghan threatened my life last night via dms

          cheolie @vernomchewing  
          @hancakes what did he say?

          josh @hancakes  
          @vernomchewing he said if i dont change my @ i will mysteriously be run over once leaving the fansign

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
OMW TO SEE MY HUSBAND!! SEOKMIN I MISSED U!!

            cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @seokminniemouse ahem

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
cheol is here too ig

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
im kidding pls seungcheol is my boyfriendand i love hi m

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
brb i gotta send a dm to someone important

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew

 

bitch  
u better let us in backstage

 

omg  
what  
who is this

 

bitch.

 

im kidding hi love <333

 

<33

 

why should i  hehe

 

...  
my friend chan is with me and he Big Loves u

 

omg i love fanboys

 

gay

 

..  
is he cute

 

yes!! my channie boy is adorable hes so soft n squishy i wanna give him a kiss on the nose  
brb doing that

 

what did he say

 

'thank u noona that truly made my day'

 

omg he sounds so cute

 

lemme link u his yt channel  
he used to just post album unboxings n then he started ranting / reviewing albums and now he jsut talks abt svt / his day and shit ppl love him CARATS love him  
youtube.com/lovinghvc

 

lovinghvc

 

yes

 

wait omg  
omg  
WAIT  
hes ADORABLE  
HIS GIGGLE

 

YETH he posts dance routines n he recently did one for lotto  
CHAN IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME I LVOE THAT BOY SM AND HEARING U LIKE HIS GIGGLE MADE ME !!

 

exos lotto or my lotto

 

..

 

gotcha

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
omg wait we're actually meeting The Boys we going BACKSTAGE YALL  
   
           alec @junbug  
           @makemewoozi i thot u were at a svt fansign?  
   
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @junbug we are??  
   
           alec @junbug  
           @makemewoozi u just said the boyz  
  
           alec @junbug  
           @makemewoozi i realize my mistake  
  
           alec @junbug  
           @makemewoozi WAIT WAHT DO OYU MEAN BY MEETING THEM  
  
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @junbug :*

 

becca @kissvernon  
lads .. was watching chan's new vlog .. svt was in it

           becca @kissvernon  
          @kissvernon LADS .. WAS WATCHING CHAN'S NEW VLOG .. YUSEUL SAID SHE'S KNOWN VERNON SINCE HIGHSCHOOL??

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
no one ever fuckin questioned why vernon follows me on twitter tho  
  
           Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew  
          @seokminniemouse ikr like I've followed you for ages

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
WE WENT TO HIGHSCHOOL TOGETHER GUYS I BEEN KNOW THIS FOOL

           yuseul @seokminniemouse  
           @seokminniemouse who tf u think taught him english

           Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew  
           @seokminniemouse Yuseul, my mother taught me English

           yuseul @seokminniemouse  
          @chwenotchew im ur mom

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

vernom: dont call me a fool online  
vernom: thts cyber bullying  
vernom: i literally can have you arrested  
  
yusoup: oh ok sorry

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul @seokminniemous  
vernons a pussy

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

vernom: .  
  
yusoup: :*  
  
vernom: ill block you  
  
yusoup: my boyfriend will beat u up

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul <3: pls beat up vernon  
  
cheolie: babe hes my ult  
  
yuseul <3: :(  
  
cheolie: omg  
cheolie: fine

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
jun stop sending me soap cutting asmr challenge  
  
           Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
           @stormcloudjun You're welcome  
  
           Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
           @stormcloudjun Send cup pong back :(

 

alyssa @pledisstan  
U BETTER SEND CUP PONG BACK MINGHAO!

 

 

chanathan @lovinghvc   
this reminds me: @chwenotchew send 9ball back

          Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew   
          @lovinghvc Ugh I hate that game tho :( 

 

 

may @sythnm   
things I was not prepared to find so adorable: the svt members using :( when talking abt imessage games 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
guyssss im literally getting icecream with jun and dokyeom from seventeen omg!!  
  
            Lee Seokmin ! ✓ @dokyeom_dk  
            @stormcloudjun did u just refer to me as dokyeom Really  
  
            hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
            @dokyeom_dk im so scared right now

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
please hhel p me lee seokmin, or dokyeom, of seventeen fame is plotting mmy assassination. am terrifyed for my life. i,m crying in a dennys bathroom.  cannot breahte.  
  
            Lee Seokmin ! ✓ @dokyeom_dk  
            @stormcloudjun omg minghao stop  
  
            Lee Seokmin ! ✓ @dokyeom_dk  
            @stormcloudjun ur not even important enough to plan an assassination for gn streaks

 

hao ~(^.^)~ @stormcloudjun  
ok that just hurt my feelings

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
i just walked into the svt dorms and i hear 'THIS BITCH EATING BEANS' and sure enough I then see minghao pushing vernon off a stool, spilling beans all over himself, i literally dont even know what to say i think im having a stroke

 

bean ? @stormcloudjun  
did i push hansol vernon chwe off a stool, promptly spilling a plate of baked beans all over himself? yes. i so totally did. did he mass snapchat everyone a picture of him crying with the caption 'just got punched in the face for eating fucking beans' yes. he so totally did. do i regret any of this? no i so totally dont.

 

  
BEANS? @moonwalkerr  
is vernon ok like this isnt even abt him getting punched why the fuck was he eating beans  
  
            alec @junbug  
            @moonwalkerr did i .. miss something  
  
            BEANS? @moonwalkerr  
            @junbug look at @stormcloudjun & @makemewoozi s recents, theyre friends with svt

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
i was texting with my cousin and very !! excitedly telling her abt hanging out with seokmin and she suddenlt goes 'who.. the fuck... is that' n i briefly say 'oh hes this friend of mine' n then shes like . 'is he ur new bf? bc i kinda liked seungcheol i would totally invite him into this family' ksdjf lkd  
  
            yuseul @seokminniemouse  
            @seokminniemouse UPDATE: i sent her 'no hes an idol! rmbr vernon from hs? yeah, hes in a group w him. its svt!' n she went 'what the dick is a svt'  
  
            yuseul @seokminniemouse  
            @seokminniemouse ANOTHER UPDATE: i told her the full name and she goes 'seventeen... svt... wh-' and i was like 'SeVenTeen' and then sends 'thats fucking stupid' im tellin vernon

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

vernom: i trusted honaka... i rly rly did  
  
yusoup: shes a fool  
yusoup: made fun of me for ultin svt  
yusoup: 'ult nct' she cried  
yusoup: BITCH I WORK WITH NCT THEYRE SO ANNOYING  i would die for all of them their lives are worth more than my own  
  
vernom: seul u ok

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
storytime from work: one time i was giving mark n johnny a quiz on krn vocab (like. the word in krn n then translate it into english) and i showed them the word for 'fountain' and mark just said REALLY  loudly 'FUCK why the fuck would we know FOUNTAIN thats such a STUPID ASS WORD its so STUPID i fucking HATE korean i HATE THIS SHIT' and johnny was like 'bro u legit got it tho u knew the word'  
  
           yuseul @seokminniemouse  
           @seokminniemouse n then mark just goes 'ya but like... why woudl she expect us to know it.' n then i was like 'but u knew it' and mark was like 'WHY WOULD YOU THINK WE WOULD KNOW IT' and johnny goes 'but you KNEW IT' and mark just went 'fuck this' and left kjsdlskls  
  
            yuseul @seokminniemouse  
            @seokminniemouse he came back like 10 minutes later with cokes for us and was like 'im sorry for my outburst i love and respect u both ur valid' i literally couldnt stop laughing  
  
            MARK !!! ✓ @NCT_Mark  
            @seokminniemouse haha noona why do u have a second twitter account haha im gonna follow it now

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
what have i DONE

  
yuseul @seokminniemouse  
gained 18 new followers. guess fucking why.  
  
            TEN ✓ @NCT_10  
            @seokminniemouse ..I'm sorry?

 

yuseul @seokminniemouse  
THEY WERENT SUPPOSE TO KNOW I ULT SEVENTEEN FUCK NCT LIVES  
   
           JUNGWOO ✓ @NCT_Jungwoo  
          @seokminniemouse ..Noona why

  
yuseul @seokminniemouse  
im not going to work tmrw  
  
           CHENLE ✓ @NCT_Chenle  
          @seokminniemouse :(  
  
           yuseul @seokminniemouse  
          @NCT_Chenle FINE ill go to work tmrw

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
i changed my @ bc Why Did I Get Verified  
  
           RENJUN ✓ @NCT_Renjun  
          @hanyuseul uwu  
  
           yuseul @hanyuseul  
           @NCT_Renjun .. watch ur back tmrw kid  
  
           MARK !!! ✓ @NCT_Mark  
           @hanyuseul @NCT_Renjun RENJUN R U N

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

Lenora @galaxyvernon  
that whole thing makes me want. to ult nct.  
  
           Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew  
           @galaxyvernon ..ouch

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul: hey chan I just realized that now that we know svt u might be able to like   
yuseul: dance with soonyoung idk   
yuseul: what is ur goal with svt 

chan: I wanna marry Vernon 

yuseul: ah ok   
yuseul: working on that 

wonu: I like how seul was kinda like 'what does chan want to do? dance with soonyoung. yeah." 

chan: I wanna dance with Michael jackson

josh: you realize hes dead right 

chan: hyung you make it so hard to enjoy being alive 

josh: thank you

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

vern: hey yuseul sent me a dance cover you did for one of my songs 

chan: omg   
chan: omg im so sorry this is so embarrassing dsjfklds 

vern: noooo it was soo good youre super talented 

chan: ldsk  
chan: that means a lot thank u sm 

vern: yw!!! I would love to see more of your dancing sometime

chan: im gonna be at my dance studio later this week 

vern: oh!! cool where is it? maybe I can come see you dance in person

chan: KDSJ yeah sounds cool!  
chan: ill text u the address hehe

vern: okie dokie 

chan: thts cute dsklfsdj

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

chan: so remember how I used to joke abt wanting to marrying Vernon one day but yall know was joking cause hes and Idol and im a Sad Gay Boy and it was joke I was making Joke 

yuseul; yh  
yuseul: u good? 

chan: not a joke anymore I think we might have a date and then I called him cute and my FUCKING heart cant take thisi

cheol: omg   
cheol: aw chansol date :((

chan: he doesn't like it when carats call him hansol tho

yuseul: I always called him Vernon  
yuseul: idk why I think it was just like  
yuseul: hah losers cant say Vernon so im gonna say it 

chan: l-leave me alone   
chan: BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBernon 

yuseul: KSLDJ

hao: YALL junnie sent me a gif of kim seokjin blowing a kiss I think I wanna kith junhui

kwan: ok but I was thinkin abt how ur name is Xu but the X is pronounced like an S so if someone had a lisp they would say Thoo   
kwan: Thoo Minghao 

hao: dskjfljskljfsd

mingyu: I feel honestly called the fuck out   
mingyu: you guyth alwayth make fun of my lithp and perthonally I find it tho tho thickening what are any of you gaining from the conthtant belittling of my thpeech impediment 

kwan: boo hoo u cant make a fucking S noise 

mingyu: hithhhh

yusuel: my fuckign LUNGS

mingyu: yuthuel thatth not very nithe  
mingyu: this is exactly why I leaked ur twitter to nct 

yuseul: MINGYUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

wonu: hes a deadman walking  
wonu: yuseul will kill a man 

mingyu: WONWOO HELP MEEEEE

wonu: mingyu I don't really like you all that much to begin with 

mingyu: aight FIRST OF ALL   
mingyu: that actually really hurt my feelings   
mingyu: AND SECOND OF ALL   
mingyu: FUCK YOU

wonu: sorry I love u  
wonu: I see  mingyu and I FLOOR IT  
wonu: but instead of the car running on gas  
wonu: it runs on love and appreciation for my best friend   
wonu: ..get it cause I see mingyu and that fills up the gas tank that runs on love and appreciation   
wonu: fuck it just ignore me 

mingyu: sorry were u saying something lol 

wonu: YKNOW WHAT 

hao: n e ways   
hao: im gonna marry WEEEEEEEEEEEEN JUNHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUI

kwan: ugh wbk 

hao: he just out here breathing and im eating this shit up!

mingyu: tell him to tell jihoon I love him no homo

hao: don't u have his number? 

mingyu: yeah but I used 'no homo' once to jihoon and he got mad and lectured me on why its wrong to say it 

kwan: my fucking ACTIVIST KING !!!!!!!!!!

mingyu: I love jihoon PLATONICALLY 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hot carat jun knows: hey I love you PLATONICALLY 

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: nice 2 know  
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ : flattered honestly 

hot carat jun knows: hehe yw   
hot carat jun knows: r u working rn?? I hope I didn't bother u 

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: nope im jus out here  
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: hand in my boxers but atm I think im too lazy to masturbate rn sigh

hot carat jun knows: KDKlds gtg

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

gyuboo: FUCK!  
gyuboo: FUCK FUCK FUCK!  
gyuboo: FUCK!

wonuwu: I can see ur typing something rn but I will take a WILD guess and say its gonna be  
wonuwu: fuck 

gyuboo: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK  
gyuboo: ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ  IS TALKING TO ME ABOUT MASTURBIGNDFKJDFKJFDKJLDF

myungho: omg hes dead  
myungho: they fucking killed him

gyuboo: who is They 

myungho: the horses 

wonuwu: *horse voice* no im fine

myungho: kjdslk

gyuboo: HES TALKING ABOUT MASTURBATING AND IM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

wonuwu: 'im a hetersexual' mingyu cries, getting hard at the idea of lee jihoon wanking. 

gyuboo: yknow I don't like EITHER  of you 

myungho: what the FUCK did I do 

gyuboo: DEFEND MY HONOR

myungho: FUCK ?? YOU ??

gyuboo: GOD DAMN

wonuwu: I need new friends 


	3. Chapter 3

hot carat jun knows: hey out of curiosity what do u have me saved in ur phone as? 

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: uhh  
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: perhaps its 'hot carat jun knows'

hot carat jun knows: what   
hot carat jun knows: did u just call me hot 

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: yh   
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: climb ya like a tree 

hot carat jun knows: WHAT 

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: what

 

**\----------**

 

 

mingyu has sent an image 

 

mingyu: CRYING? IM CRYING? LEE JINHOON CALLING ME HOT TELLING ME HE WANTS TOCLIMB ME LIKE A TREE

hao: jinhoon 

mingyu: THTOP IT IM CRYING THU MINGHAO

hao: SDJKSKD

yuseul: CLIMB YA LIKE A TREE KDFSKSDKJLD  
yuseul: BITCH MOOD  
yuseul: CLIMB CHEOL LIKE A TREE  
yuseul: MM BOYFRIEND

cheol: uwu ?

hao: don't u have me saved as 'the great uwu'

cheol: I used to  
cheol: now ur just hao

hao: unu

wonu: stop that

chan: no one mentioned that gyu hyung has him saved as ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ tho

mingyu: SHUT

josh: omg chan im so proud ur learning to read :,)

chan: .  
chan: im going on a date with Hansol Vernon Chwe I don't need this

josh: ;W; my illiterate chan

chan: STOP

mingyu: CLIMB YA LIKE A TREE  
mingyu: GUYS

 

hao has renamed the chat climb ya like a tree

 

mingyu: THTOP WHAT IF HE THEETH THAT

wonu: ima send screenshots to soonyoung

mingyu: WONWOO

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

flan bringer: jihoon said he was gonna climb mingyu like a tree so now mingyu is being gay and crying 

hamster boy: omg   
hamster boy: fantastic   
hamster boy: jihoon has been so irritable lately cant wait til he finally gets some Bussy 

flan bringer: mingyu is straight 

hamster boy: the  
hamster boy: u just said--

flan bringer: yeah. yeah I did just said.

hamster boy: that wasn't proper grammar 

flan bringer: shut up you probably ship yoonmin

hamster boy: WHAT?

flan bringer: its like  
flan bringer: bts 

hamster boy: I KNOW WHY WOULD YOU ACCUSE ME OF SHIPPING THAT SHIP ITS FAKE AND CREATED BY THE HETEROSEXUALS 

flan bringer: wkdsjdksdl

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

wonu has sent an image 

 

wonu: when am I gonna marry him :// 

yuseul: ugh when am I gonna marry Seokmin 

cheol: after u marry Me 

kwan: what abt me im important 

yuseul: ofc im marrying Seungkwan instead   
yuseul: the only man who has never hurt me 

cheol: wtf the fuck 

yuseul: u left hickies on my tiddies they hurt :(( 

cheol: babe :( 

kwan: yuthuel doesn't give a Fuck 

yuseul: I rly don't Joshua helps me lingerie shop 

josh: word 

yuseul: n e ways my lunch break is done in five I gotta go help w lyric trans hhhhhhhhh  
yuseul: someone once said I was lucky to work for sm bc I get to meet idols yknow what do fucking kyungsoo threatens me over imessage into playing 8ball with him every fucking day I doubt this was actually worth it bye gotta go help teach jungwoo how to say skrt   
yuseul: but actually helping w lyrics for regular 

hao: JKSDKSD  
hao: SKAYRT   
hao: ˡᵘᶜᵃˢ  
hao: the fuck is regular

wonu: talk abt my bias as nothing more than a fucking uwu boy one more fucking time minghao   
wonu: wait thats the new english single  
wonu: yuseul please 

hao: ˢᵏᵃʸʳᵗ

wonu: we live together 

hao: ˢᵏᵃʸʳᵗ ˢᵏᵃʸʳᵗ

mingyu: he just left the apartment kjsfdkl  
mingyu: OH MY GOD I LEFT JIHOON ON READ 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hot carat jun knows: dfhk hi sorry my roommate needed smth

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: I see   
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: u cool dw   
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: hey what do u have me saved as? 

hot carat jun knows: huh  
hot carat jun knows: ʸᵃˡˡ ʰᵉᵃʳ ˢᵘᵐⁿ

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: I told u :( 

hot carat jun knows: fuc  
hot carat jun knows: ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: huh  
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: ʸᵃˡˡ ʰᵉᵃʳ ˢᵘᵐⁿ

hot carat jun knows: ur saved as ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ bc of an inside joke I have with wonwoo   
hot carat jun knows: basically we both got teenage white ver but I got a Vernon pc ( that chan inevitably stole ) and wonwoo got .. u   
hot carat jun knows: and when he unpackaged it I went "ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ" and its funny cause no one acknowledges I have an uwu voice but I have an uwu voice and a lisp so its like   
hot carat jun knows: ᵗʰᵒᵐᵉᵗᶦᵐᵉᵗʰ ᴵ ʲᵘᵗʰᵗ ᵗᵃˡᵏ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ᵗʰᶦᵗʰ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁿᵒ ᵒⁿᵉ ʳᵉᵃˡˡʸ ⁿᵒᵗᶦᶜᵉᵗʰ ᵈᵉˢᵖᶦᵗᵉ ᵇᵉᶦⁿᵍ ᵃ ᵗʳᵉᵉ ᴵᴹ ᶠᴬᴰᴵᴺᴳᴳᴳᴳ

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: KDSFJKLDS  
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: ᴵᴹ ᶠᴬᴰᴵᴺᴳᴳᴳᴳ  
ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: IM FJKDKJ

hot carat jun knows: LITHTEN I CAN EXTHPLAIN

ʷᵒᵒᶻᶦ ᵒᵖᵖᵃ: stoppdjldsjkds

gyu: THTOP MAKING FUN OF MY LITHP YOURE JUTHT LIKE THE RETHT  
gyu: THATTH IT YOURE JUTHT JIHOON THAVED IN MY PHONE NOW

jihoon: NOOOO :((((  
jihoon: what if I buy u lunch 

gyu: hmm  
gyu: ok 

jihoon: !!

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul: haha noona is so funny she was so embarrassed when we followed her twitter 

cheol: it took her like three months to give me her phone password why tf is she letting you on her phone mark? 

yuseul: haha idk   
yuseul: noona is so nice she bought us shaved ice 

cheol: wtf YUMIKA BUY ME SHAVED ICE

yuseul: she said she wants the phone back for a sec n for u to check pm

cheol: ok  
cheol: oh-

yuseul: im back!! she wont let me see what she sent u

cheol: yeah uh you wouldn't be interested in it anyways 

hao: dom yuseul jumped out

mingyu: I THINK I AGREED TO A LUNCH DATE WITH LEE JIHOON

yuseul: wait haha u mean like woozi from seventeen?

mingyu: what  
mingyu: yes  
mingyu: n-noona? 

yuseul: this Mark 

mingyu: u mean like  
mingyu: jark ? 

yuseul: I just want to take a nap but sm wont let me 

mingyu: omg  
mingyu: mark are you okay  
mingyu: blink twice if you need help 

yuseul: save me 

mingyu: MARK DO I NEED TO CALL THE POLICE  
mingyu: MARK  
mingyu: MARK ARE YOU OKAY

yuseul: wtf I just found my phone on the floor mark treat my stuff better u fucker 

mingyu: THEY FUCKING KILLED HIM

yuseul: omg u have a date w jihoon?

mingyu: WHAT?   
mingyu: oh yeah  
mingyu; I think  
mingyu: which im scared to ask if it is a date bc like  
mingyu: it rly shouldn't be considering im not like          gay 

yuseul: yh  
yuseul: free food anyways 

mingyu: yh yh  
mingyu: … i-is mark ok

yuseul: hes in a the new nct unit nct j  
yuseul: it has jungwoo jisung jaemin jeno johnny and jark 

mingyu: hes fucking dead 

hao: guys im gonan go cry over jun on twitter rt my stuff

wonu: ugh

mingyu: ugh  
mingyu: WIAT NFUCKIG NFUCK FCU K FUCK FUCK  FU CK FUCK NO NON ONON  
  
hao: omg sorry i said anything  
  
mingyu: LEE GUKCING JOHOON LIKEDK MY SWTTT STUO STIP STOP STOP STIP  
mingyu: NO OPLESEE  
mingyu: ITS ABOTU WANTING OT KISS HIM FUCK IM GOING TO MEET HIM FOR LUNCH TOCAY  
  
wonu: omg..  
wonu: this is so sad alexa play im not afraid anymore  
  
mingyu: IMN OT GAY  
  
cheol: .  
cheol: anyways I hope jark is okay  
cheol: also for my roommates yuseul is bringing bondage out tonight cause I called her yumika so I suggest u don't come home 

kwan: I  
kwan: thanks 

 

 

**\-----------**

 

  
cheolie @vernomchewing  
mingyu with his "i wanna kiss lee jihoon but im a heterosexual" headass my resignation letter will be on joshuas desk in the morning  
  
          josh @hancakes  
          @vernomchewing i already quit fucker  
   
          cheolie @vernomchewing  
          @hancakes guess its up to yuseul  
   
          yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
          @vernomchewing @hancakes ah, fuck

 

kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
shua hyung IS the human embodiment of the 'i let the cat drink my bathwater' 'not a sin but still weird' tweet  
  
          josh @hancakes  
          @makemewoozi i literally am the creator i was beaten down in a alleyway for th rights to it    
   
          kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi   
          @hancakes i see, forgive my ignorance  
   
           josh @hancakes  
           @makemewoozi no

 

 

kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi   
in other news I know too much about my roommates sex life and I REALLY wish I was getting laid sometime soon

          alec @junbug   
          @makemewoozi .. h-hey..

          kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi   
          @junbug don't u live in Canada 

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
beans? @stormcloudjun  
fun fact! when i was learning korean i obviously learned the basics first, like grammar and numbers and colors, so whenever i would hear a color, number, etc i would get rly excited and be like 'wow im out here learning a whole langugae'  
     
         Wen Junhui ✓ @Junhui_1996  
         @stormcloudjun This is the cutest thing I've heard all day

 

  
kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
noona so damn powerful.. out here a translator for sm.. has enough power over nct to get them to Kick Anyone's Asses.. doms seungcheol hyungs ass everynight... slim thick.. multilingual.. conventionally attractive.. she can hit high notes too.. her bde is insane  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @makemewoozi dont tell anyone im asthmatic ill loose my street cred  
   
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @makemewoozi but ngl this made my day :( ily kwan

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul: hey  
yuseul: yr a vocal god 

seokie: omg thank u 

yuseul: I just needed to tell u that 

seokie: u flatter me :((

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
@vernomchewing can we breakup I wanna marry seokmin

          cheolie @vernomchewing   
          @hanyuseul ig ill just marry soonyoung we good 

          yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul   
          @vernomchewing ok lmao thanks babe 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul: heyyyyy ur a sweetie pie!!!  I wanted to tell u sepreatly off of twt jus cus

kwannie: omgg thank u noona ilu

yuseul yee yee   
yuseul: my FAVE baby boy boo 

kwannie: sdklfdsjl stop :((  
kwannie: do u wanna come watch some dumb movies w me ? 

yuseul: YEE YEE ima be done w work in half an hour   
yuseul: ill bring take out :((   
yuseul: oof Joshua said he wants to join

kwannie: oh  
kwannie: yea that's fine! we can invite more ppl too!

yuseul: okie dokie mwah

kwannie: smooch 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

kwan: ye

vern: ye

kwan: I think we're having a movie party thing do any of u guys want to join  
kwan: its at kwancheolseulshua 

vern: long n complicated ass name   
vern: I cant actually tho im on a date kdsljl

kwan: oh?   
kwan: okay  
kwan: bye bye 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

kwan: VERNON HAS ACKNOWLEDGED HIS THING W CHAN IS A DATE

yuthuel: PRESS F FOR RESPECTS 

scoupert: F

shua: F

kwan: F

yuthuel: also um uh  
yuthuel: I asked    what are good movie recs bc Im watching movies w my boyz

scoupert: ʸᵃˡˡ ʰᵉᵃʳ ˢᵘᵐⁿ

yuthuel: h-half of nct n t-two exo members are joining us 

kwan: who all

yuthuel: jark, jungwoo, ten, taeyong, chenle, jaehyun, doyoung, n johnny   
yuthuel: also kyungsoo n y-yixing

scoupert: WHAT   
scoupert: JUNGWOO? 

yuthuel: yeth

kwan: what abt yuta

yuthuel: what about that minecraft witch looking kim jion looking long ass face looking ass bitch 

kwan: damn seul

yuthuel: nah hes my fave boy we bond over being japanese or whateva  
yuthuel: he has shit 2 do 

kwan: yo real talk noona alrdy knew vern + she literally works w nct and exo why was it so hard for us to befriend svt

shua: bc u dont just meet god like that 

kwan: which member is god

shua: who do u think

kwan: ok true

scoupert: who are we talking abt?

kwan: seokmin

shua: seokmin

yuthuel: DOKYEOOOOOOOOOMMMM

scoupert: YEE YEE

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yusoup: vern wtf

vernom: ?¿

yusoup: ok the other day the roomies + kpop boys all were watchinf movies  
yusoup: n idk they left, next morning i go to work, i come home today n cheol seems upset with me :(

vernom: wtf why

yusoup: IDK like im rly sad abt tbhs  
yusoup: i was telling him abt my day while i was making dinner n he just seemed very :// 

vernom: im sorry seullie :( maybe hes said smth to kwan or josh? try askinf one of them  
vernom: im sure its rly nothing tho he loves u a lot !! it might just be smth else gettin to him 

yusoup: i hope :(  
yusoup: ALSO THOT TELL ME SBT UR DATE WITH CHANSTHAN

vernom: HDSJ DAMN OK!  
vernom: sksj we hung out at his studio for like an hour n he showed me some of his routines hes been working on and then we got dinner snd just walked arnd for a bit :( it was so nice hes so cute

yusoup: BITCH I CSNT EVEN TELL U HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS LIKE hes been literally so  enamored by u these past couple years just as an idol like :(( bitch chan got a vernon pc in love and letter repackaged n legit was so happy :((

vernon: like idk im just so into spending time with him i would be happy to just hold his hand and listen to him tslk abt his day i want Kiss  
vernom: wait didnt that album come with two pcs?

yusoup: yea he got u n jun

vernom: did minghao take the jun pc

yusoup: minghao took the jun pc

vernom: jesus

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul: hey kwannie :( can we talk?

kwannie: ofc! whats up!?

yuseul: is cheol mad at me?

kwannie: ?¿ no i dont think so ?¿ why do u ask?

yuseul: hes jsut seemed a little weird n upset isn  
yuseul: like i was telling him abt my day n i just finished telling him abt getting lunch w ksoo oppa and then he jsut seemed :/

kwannie: OH yea i know what it is

yuseul: ?? what

kwannie: lmfao noona.. cmon

yuseul: bro :( i rly dont know pls

kwannie: rmbr how hyung once told u that he is a little self conscious bc ur literslly A Model

yuseul: cheol is a fuckinf babe tho

kwannie: mood yes the things i would do

yuseul: sjsksjs

kwannie: legit... ksoo hyung was flirtnf with u... the whole night

yuseul: WHAT  
yuseul: no wksjsks what no he threatens my life everytime i beat him in 8ball bleh he doesnt like me

kwannie: legit everyone falls for u

yuseul: ugh admit ur in love with me

kwannie: <3 wife <3

yuseul: my husband is a gay man omg

kwannie: yeth

yuseul: but :(( idk i dotn like ksoo hes wonderful honestly like a very good friend but i dont see him thst way i only love seungcheol i swear

kwannie: our marriage is a lie..

yuseul: fine <3 i only love cheol n u

kwannie: ty

yuseul: but shiukd i talk to him?¿ idk i dont wanna be like “hey!! dickhead!! i only love u!! no ksoo!!”

kwannie: just bring uo thst u noticed hes been weird lately and mention it stsrted when u mentioned kyungsoo and just talk it through  
kwannie: bc u love him... and he loves u we all know thst snd you both know that but rn hes kind of doubting himsled

yuseul: but whyy

kwannie: a very very famous idol is hitting on his girlfriend, cmon its some competition:/

yuseul: i literally only want to be with seungcheol

kwannie: our marriage :((

yuseul: jokes aside. i love him.

kwannie: yall r sweet

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

kwan: softly, but with feeling “fuck”

vern: ?? is everything ok ?

kwan: yes :) totally  
kwan: everything is awesome

vern: coulda mf fooled me..  
vern: are you sure?

kwan: yes i swear im positive   
kwan: i was gonna say we ought to do smth bc i .. am wee bit distressed atm but ur probably busy

vern: uhh ill be free in like half an hour   
vern: so arnd then? ye im down

kwan: okie dokie

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

youngmoney: ayo josh uh i have smth to talk to u abt

westcoast: im so sorry vernon my hand is already promised to another we are to be wed in the fall

youngmoney: what

westcoast: what

youngmoney: did u just—  
youngmoney: never mind  
youngmoney: at home.. aprtmnt wise... is everythint alright?

westcoast: should things not?

youngmoney: idk seul came to me the other day and said hyung was upset wjth her wnd just now kwan is, in his words, a wee bit distressed 

westcoast: oh well yh i mean cheol got a wee bit upset over ksoo flirting with seul.. she didnt even realize n cheol just said he didnt know how to react to it but didnt mean to take it out on her ..  
westcoast: ive heard seungkwan was the one that told her abt the flirting

youngmoney: well i doubt its just a guilty conscious 

westcoast: r u suggesting i snoop through seungkwans phone 

youngmoney: when did i ever hint at that

westcoast: bro u are so wild i cant believe im dojnf this  
westcoast: lmfao brb haha ur crazy

youngmoney: this is why i like chan more than you

westcoast: i heard yall wrnt on a date that shit is gay

youngmoney: yes super

westcoast: jokes aside do u like him legit

youngmoney: yes ?¿ i wanan go on more dates with him and hold his hand and watch him get excited over froyo dates and ugh why am i whipped wtf

westcoast: bro im fucking thrilled u like him this shit is Good

youngmoney: thx i hope he and i go on another date soon

westcoast: have u asked him?

youngmoney: n-no..

westcoast: fool child  
westcoast: aight uhh just #hacked seungkwans phone and UhhHhHhH

youngmoney: whats up??

westcoast: kwan n seul were talking abt her n cheols relationship, she was all “uwu i love cheolie so much” n idk kwan seemed  
westcoast: odd

youngmoney: odd

westcoast: he was like joking arnd abt him n seul being married.. n then she was like “nah but fr Cheol”  
westcoast: n idk he just semed weird when she mentioned cheol n him dating seul

youngmoney: .. uh

westcoast: huh

youngmoney: isnt seungkwan gay  
youngmoney: could he maybe.. like cheol hyung?

westcoast: press F for fucking respects

youngmoney: FFFFFFF

westcoast: bro :/ dont tell anyone but seungcheol and i Kind of dated briefly for like a month like 4 yrs ago

youngmoney: WTF

westcoast: yh yh it was actually awhile but :/ ugh idk cheol is always super dedicated in relationships and im just  
westcoast: feeling for kwan ?¿ like yall know cheol wouldnt leave yuseul hes literally so in love with her

youngmoney: their relationship is good :(

westcoast: i never asked abt this but seungcheol asked to borrow my laptop awhile ago ://///// he was looking st engagement rings 

youngmoney: FUCK

westcoast: oh jesus.. n then theres kwan...

youngmoney: should one of us talk to him??

westcoast: ill talk to him abt it soon.. dw ok?

youngmoney: :( ok

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
somebody fuckin stop minghao hes abt to be horny on main ://

 

beans? @stormcloudjun  
mmmmmmmhands

beans? @stormcloudjun  
his   hands. oh boy. please fuckinf CHOKE ME!

beans? @stormcloudjun  
i dont do a lot (ju)st for sex but whe(n) the situation begs for t(h)e tr(u)e an(i)malistic nature o(f) o(u)r spe(c)ies who, a boy in (k)orea, a(m) i to d(e)ny?

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
decode the ~secret message~ in minghaos tweet n call out his horny on main bullshit and i will paypal you $30

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

beans? @stormcloudjun  
i dont do a lot (ju)st for sex but whe(n) the situation begs for t(h)e tr(u)e an(i)malistic nature o(f) o(u)r spe(c)ies who, a boy in (k)orea, a(m) i to d(e)ny?

          Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
          @stormcloudjun Yuseul owes me $30

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao: WHAT  
hao: no  
hao: NO I LITERALLT  
hao: FUCKING FORGOT YOU FOLLOW ME OH MYGOD IMSK SO SORRRHDN IM SO SORRY  
hao: JUN IM SO SORRY I   
hao: IM FUCKIFN SPEECHLESS IM SO SORRY

jun: hey

hao: FUCK  
hao: IM LOTERWLLY SOBBING YHST WAS SO MESSED UP FOR ME TO TWEET IM SO SORRY  
hao: PLEAE S DONT HATE ME IT WAS A JOKE N I DIRNT THINKS BOUT IT  
hao: oh hey uh whats up

jun: uh my like best friend just tweeted he wants me to fuck him  
jun: but other than that

hao: FUCKSJSJS IM SO SORRT  
hao: i literally feel so bad im really sorry if i made you creeped out or uncomfortable 

jun: well like  
jun: look i dont  
jun: ...want to have sex but i have my own reasons for that lmao ..   
jun: but minghao?  
jun: do you   
jun: legitimately   
jun: maybe   
jun: like me?

hao: uh

jun: i just uh

hao: well i mean

jun: like if that was just horny on main Cool but like signs are Arising 

hao: its just like i dont want to make you uncomfortable or anything

jun: like if you do like me then thats awesome

hao: i mean its fine if you just dont wanna screw me but like i mean crush wise HAH.. funny story  
hao: HUH

jun: huh

hao: t-thats awesome

jun: y-yh..?

hao: DOES THAT MEAN YOU- YOU LIKE ME?

jun: UH

hao: LIKE

jun: I MEAN

hao: WAIR WIATBWAIT

jun: I MGITH

hao: WHAT  
hao: JUN IM GONAN PUKE

jun: damn if u dont like me jus say it

hao: OH SHUT THE FUCK UP IM HAVINF A HEART ATTACK

jun: FUCKIN  
jun: PLEASE

hao: DO TOU LIKE ME

jun: wellllll

hao: JUN PEASE IM GOING TO START CRYIN

jun: STOP THAT

hao: COME OVER I WANT TO TALK THISBOUT IN PERSON YOU FUCKING GRAPE

jun: damn ok omw 

 

 

\---------- 

 

 

myungho: CAN YOU BOTH PLEASE LEAVE I MIGHT START CRYING EITHER WAY BUT I WOULD PREFER IF YOU WERENT HERE

gyuboo: NO WHY ARE YOU CRYIGN

myungho: I MIGHT GET A BOYFRIEND 

wonu: omg

gyuboo: u mean junnie :((

myungho: ye :(

wonu: bitch spill

myungho: things wonwoo isnt allowed to say - that

wonu: >:(

myungho: i was horny on main n seul exposed me... jun say n well

myungho has sent an image 

myungho has sent an image

myungho: sigh

wonu: not to be that bitch  
wonu: but how the fuck u forget ur ult follows u on twitter

myungho: I WAS. HORNY.  
myungho: AS IF I EVEN RMBR MY OWN NAME WHEN IM HORNY

gyuboo: minghao jerks off when he gets confessed too <3 2k friends to lover M rated 

wonu: GFNDJSJ

myungho: YOU BOTH ARE LITERALLY SO UGLY DIESNSJS  
myungho: pls leave tho jun is coming over so we can DISCUSS :((

gyuboo: minghao gonna get his dick SUCKT

wonu: *scattered asexual applause*

gyuboo: fuck off

wonu: no

myungho: he said sex makes him eh rn IDK I WONT PUSH HIM I LOVE HIM FUCKSH

wonu: gyu had a date with jihoon yesterday, minghao bout to date wen junhui   
wonu: n yet.. soonyoung remains Not my boyfriend

gyuboo: hang on u wanan- wanna DATE Soonyoung ??

wonu: yes??

myungho: TAKE IT TO PM AND FUCKING LEAVE JUN IS IN THE ELEVATOR 

wonu: im on a hellevatorrr

myungho: SHUT UP

wonu: changbin would fucking never treat me this way 

gyuboo: boo hoo bitch 

myungho: just wish me luck thots i might get a boyfriend out of THJS

wonu: we r leaving for a cat cafe as we speak please marry jun

gyuboo: we’re goin to a cat cafe?

wonu: yes

gyuboo: u didnt even ask me wtf

wonu: we’re going to a cat cafe bitch

gyuboo: omg.. wonwoo when u take charge like this... ;)

wonu: disgusting 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i didnt update my entire life as i know it is completely falling apart as i type this authors note but yknow heres wjlyt
> 
> <3 ilu guys tho i actually am rly sorry abt slow updates


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan vav

wonu: omg i just held thiscat and his name is frezno and hes a tabby cat im gna cry he  soft

gyuboo: stop cryin loser  
gyuboo: or should i say  
gyuboo: pussy

wonu: literally go suck jihoons dick

myungho: GUYS JUN LEFT TO GET US ICECREAM   
myungho: GUYS IM LITERALLY LOOSING MY MIND I CANT FUCKING BREATHE  
myungho: HE ASKED ME TO BE HIS BOYFRIEND

wonu: BRO

gyuboo: BRO

wonu: LETS GET THIS FUCKING BREAD

myungho: IM RLY OUT HERE CRYING MY EYESOUT LEMME JUS  SO B B B JSDFLKSF

gyuboo: tfw u literal start dating your ult  
gyuboo: when will i ever

wonu: you get emo over jihoon on the regs

gyuboo: regs

wonu: shut up you fucking emo fuck

gyuboo: stop calling me emo

wonu: true ur a failed emo

gyuboo: im oddly More offended 

wonu: #NotMyRodrick

gyuboo: STOP

myungho: CAN WE J U ST ACKNOWLEDGE FOR A MINUTE  
myungho: IM D A T I NG WEN JUNHUI  
myungho: IM DATING JUN  
myungho: H ES MY BOYFRIEND HE HE HE HE  
myungho: HEEEEE 

wonu: this is so cute alexa play jerika 

gyuboo: the

myungho: u called

gyuboo: THE--

myungho: n e ways jun n i are gna eat icecream n cuddle n watch shane dawsons jake paul documentary 

wonu: have fun

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
seungcheol answering my calls challenge FAILED 

          MARK !!! ✓ @NCT_Mark   
          @hanyuseul me n the boys got ur back noona haha

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
im so fucking powerful the entire nct subunit nct 127 would murder for me 

 

cheolie @vernomchewing   
u dont know true fear until you see three missed called from Han Yuseul 

          yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul   
          @vernomchewing i rly just wanted to know what u wanted for dinner pls chill 

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul   
o well kwan and i decided on sushi 

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

shua: heyy kwan might i ask you something

boo: sure? whats up hyung 

shua: look ive just  
shua: noticed this on and off and vernon really brought it to my attention so i think ill just flat out ask it   
shua: seungcheol and yuseul..

boo: yeah..? 

shua: you have a crush dont you?

boo: uh

shua: look .. i dated seungcheol briefly and i know how dedicated he is in relationships, and he definetly loves yuseul a lot and just.. look i dont want you to be hurt if you really do like him

boo: oh  
boo: shit like  
boo: i mean i do like him  
boo: but its just so fucking scary

shua: why is it scary?

boo: because its just a hundred different emotions rolling around inside of me all at once and i have no idea what to do about it   
boo: i feel so selfish and gross 

shua: so long as you dont treat him badly for being with yuseul, or idk make a move despite his relationship, there isn't anything wrong with this  
shua: you dont control who you love

boo: im trying really hard to keep my feelings in check   
boo: ill keep working on it tho  
boo: thanks for talkingt o me.. its good to get it off my chest  
boo: ilu hyung

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

wonu: mingyu is  a bitch pass it on

myungho: wbk

gyuboo: what-

wonu: bitch says to me last night he has some groceries he wants me to pick up for him tmrw n i say ok

myungho: ok

wonu: he left me out printed pictures of what i needed to buy rather than write jt down

gyuboo: i didnt want to confuse u

wonu: eat a DICK

gyuboo: is jun still here 

wonu: u gon eat his dick?

gyuboo: .

myungho: no jun has officially Left he has idol shit to do :((  
myungho: ugh i miss my boyfriend  
myungho: guys wtf hes rly my boyfrined i love him

gyubpoo: loaf ur boy 

wonu: hey guys rmbr when i mentioned that cat named frezo that i got to hold

myungho: yes he was a tabby cat i rmbr the pictures from the Gram

wonu: i adopted frezno 

gyuboo: woo our apartment building doesnt allow pets

wonu: ur in this with me fuckers

myungho: when in doubt make seventeen adopt the cat

wonu: frenzo is M I N E 

 

**\----------**

 

 

Chanathan @lovinghvc   
to be dramatic vernon is the most beautiful man ive ever seen

          Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew   
          @lovinghvc <3

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao: yall uh

yuseul: wh

hao: so rmbr how yesterday yuseul exposed me for being horny on main

yuseul: BITCH U EXPOSED YOUR DAMN SELF

hao: OKAY SHUT UP NOW  
hao: anyways jun texted me after tht

cheol: oh fuck

hao: h-hes kind of my boyfriend now

kwan: BI T C H

hao: YH

wonu: its true i was there  
wonu: actually i wasnt there minghao kicked mingyu and i out of the apartment or whateva

yuseul: DHSJ

mingyu: we went to a cat cafe

wonu: I GOT A  CAT

yuseul: O M W OVER

cheol: babe arent you at work

chan: hey guys vernon and i are playing black jack and i just won the rights to ‘no f.u.n.’ so like theres that

josh: just like nine different conversations are happening all at once kajdjd

yuseul: mark and yuta r coming with me to see frezno 

wonu: hes real soft i love him

josh: chan win the rights to ‘adore u’ i want it 

chan: ok

hao: guys please im dating wen junhui

chan: WHAT

 

wonu has sent an image

 

wonu: heres frezno in his ‘landlord made a surprise visit and we arent allowed pets’ cubby i gave him a blanket and a picture of him and i together

yuseul: yuta jus SCREECHED in japanese ‘i gotta HOLD him’ im gna piss myself dkdjdjd

hao: im going to see jun wtf give us attention 

mingyu: yall think jihoon hyung likes me

kwan: yh gay boy

mingyu: shut

kwan: im dtf woozi

mingyu: maybe i am gay i jus wanna hold his hand

chan: lmao wbk 

yuseul: this is so funny yuta n i are talking n japanese n mark is saying to me in english with the FLATEST voice in THICK ASS CANADIAN ACCENT ‘noona please’

 

wonu has sent an image

 

wonu: heres frezno claiming mingyus bedroom as his own territory 

mingyu: i havent slept in my own bed in two days

wonu: yeah

chan: i dont like cats theyre scary :((

wonu: wtf

chan: vernon called me cute wtf

wonu: wtf

chan: yall if junhao can date why the fuck cant chansol date  
chan: man hes just so soft n shit i Love him

cheol: im gonna fucking scream guys im grocery shopping and yall wont shut the fuck up

yuseul: has chan won the rights for adore u yet

chan: ive won tht and more  
chan: TRAUMA GOT ME BAD BAD

mingyu: YOOOOO

cheol: yuseul how the fuck do i use coupons

yuseul: the  
yuseul: babe u just   
yuseul: hand it to them

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

kwan: questioning why i like him

shua: i think yuseul is doing the fuckin same

kwan: can u believe uve slept with him

shua: i wake up in a cold sweat from it nightly 

kwan: is it at least the sexy kind

shua: eh it varies 

kwan: i see

shua: oh well guess ill marry jeonghan 

kwan: the

 

**\----------**

 

 

cheol: groceries have been bought

yuseul: did u get my bread

cheol: omg i didnt

yuseul: babe

cheol: lets get this bread

chan: hyung stop breathing 

 

hao has sent a video

 

hao: give us attention

josh: WTF  
josh: ARE YOU DATING JUN?

hao: Y E A H FUCKING DUMBASSES

chan: i go on a date with nonnie n yall shit urselves but hyung gotta send a whole video of them KISSING to get any reaction 

hao: JSJS LITERALLY

josh: hah u caught us we all are homophobic 

chan: i cant believe what i just read  
chan: JOSHUA I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD

josh: i cant believe ur reading

yuseul: chan is gna marry vernon n not invite joshua

josh: ill just tweet abt it

yuseul: i got kinda sad that drake didnt go to josh pecks wedding but i remembered drake is transphobic 

cheol: ik yall mean that bell fellow but u keep thinkin u mean drizzy

kwan: drizzy 

cheol: yah

mingyu: i cant believe joshua hyung is homophobic 

josh: believe it  
josh: its only cause i haven’t had sex in a good minute 

kwan: mood

josh: wanna fuck

kwan: On my way! 

mingyu: hyung u gotta rmbr we’re all people here n u gain nothing by hating others

josh: FUCK rainbow lives

hao: guys i lowkey just made out with wen junhui im gna yeet myself 

chan: why does noona speak english

mingyu: HYUNG.. there is only 1 race... the human race...

josh: WHAT ABOUT NASCAR 

yuseul: my parents divorced n my mom lived in france / england on n off for work so whenever i would visit it would be for different halves of the year uwu my dad stayed in korea so i learned a million fuckin languages  
yuseul: hence why i have a british accent when speaking english uwu

hao: im out here bilingual as fuc

josh: fivelingual 

hao: die ?¿ please ?

josh: u jus mad bro

hao: y u sad

josh: idk nan molla

yuseul: i wanna learn mandarin jus to know wtf theyre saying

mingyu: shua hyung clowned him n minghao referenced BTS (방탄소년단) ‘FAKE LOVE’

yuseul: u speak mandarin so well teach me

hao: .  
hao: no offense but mandarin is my first language Yuseul Please

yuseul: ill teach u japanese n u teach me mandarin uwu

hao: deal UWU

chan: so vernon isnt talking to me anymkre

yuseul: wtf why??

chan: i said his mansae hair lowkey was like th ‘all i wanted was fuckinf bangs’ vine n then i was like ‘cept u didnt havw any bangs u juat had tht fortune cookie looking ass shit’ n he laughed, then got quiet, then said he needed a minute n hes been standing out on the balcony for a good ten minutes

hao: yh jeonghan seems concerned 

yuseul: NDJSJSJS IMFIJCK

chan: guys how am i ever suppose to marry vernon if he out on a balcony:/

yuseul: go to him

chan: go to him?

hao: vernon b like ‘come to me’

cheol: come to me

josh: naegero wa

wonu: die

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao?¿ @stormcloudjun   
@ svt dorms, i look out to the balcony, chan and vernon r dancing to exos love me right ~romanctic universe~ ugh when will jun and i ever

 

chanathan @lovinghvc   
yall why the fuck havent i vlogged any of my Time Spent with seventeen

          chanathan @lovinghvc   
          @lovinghvc yall im rly so STUPID my yt channel focuses on SEVENTEEN i then MEET SEVENTEEN and BEFRIEND SEVENTEEN and **** ** **** **** VERNON of SEVENTEEN AND I HAVENT EVEN-

          chanathan @lovinghvc   
          @lovinghvc fuck this vernon js doing a tag wjth me

          yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul   
          @lovinghvc ‘get to know my boyfriend’ tag

           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul   
           @lovinghvc im being sarcastic carats Pleas

 

leona @galaxyvernon   
ok but.. what did chan censor in his tweet.. what u do with vernon 

            vanessa @kysbaby   
            @galaxyvernon he Fall In Love With Vernon wbk

 

 

**\----------**

  

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
cheol is fucking drunk but hes the cutest drunk in the world i love him i loveeee himmmm

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
hes making me sit on his lap and hes holding my waist and went "ur waist is so tiny ur so tiny omg ur so pretty like wow such a pretty girl" I LOVE: HIM

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
OH MY GOD... i turned arnd to kiss him and he went 'WHOA... IK I SAID YOURE PRETTY BUT I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND..." oh my GOD

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
i went 'im ur gf' and he was like 'wait. holy shit. YOURE my gf? YOU??' like honestly is this a compliment or an insult bc im scared hes abt to say he was gonna dump me... for me....

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
i kissed his nose and he blushed real hard and just goes 'oh my god you make my heart do the thump stuff' WHAT THE UFCKK HES SO CUTEEE

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
joshua is ALSO drunk and hes just sitting in the fucking rocking chair and goes 'this is so gross where the fuck is jeonghan' ugh @yoonjeonghan040895 pls come collect him  
  
           Yoon Jeonghan ✓ @yoonjeonghan040895  
           @hanyuseul omg what

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
guys i finally got out of cheol why theyre drunk..  
            
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @hanyuseul minghao got sad over juns lines in lover&letter and said 'take a fucking shot everytime jun says aju nice' and then proceeded to put aju nice on repeat and take a shot everytime jun said aju  
          nice  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @hanyuseul and then josh & cheol didnt know what to do with the 53kg drunk chinese kid so they put him in the bathtub and then they left and then hao started running the faucet and screamed IM WASHING ME AND MY CLOTHES so josh took him out of the tub and left him on the floor of MY ROOM and now minghao is wet and drunk in cheol n mys bed  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @hanyuseul and then they decided minghao was plenty safe so they both decided to finish off the bottle of soju and now theyre both drunk  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
          @hanyuseul joshua is crying now cause he has no one to cuddle and he said 'i know i act like a fucking asshole most of the time but its only cause i want someone to love pls someone love me' and i  
  
           Yoon Jeonghan ✓ @yoonjeonghan040895  
           @hanyuseul jun and i are coming over..

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
update: jun is hugging minghao and then minghao started crying and he was like "jun didnt get a lot of lines in aju nice..' and jun went 'ik.. i am jun' and minghao started crying againa nd said 'YOU DIDNT GET A LOT OF LINES IN AJU NICE IM SORRY MR JUN' and im literally abt to piss myself

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
ive gained like 3k more followers from literally just tweeting abt this i kjsdjds

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
jun: mighao why are your clothes all wet  
minghao: u didnt get a lot of lines in aju nice  
jun: minghao why are your clothes all wet tho?  
minghao: u didnt get a lot of lines in aju nice  
jun: minghao-  
minghao: u didnt get a lot of lines in aj  
            
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @hanyuseul jun: but why are u wet?   minghao: can u sing me all of aju nice

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
jun is singing aju nice

  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @hanyuseul EJONGHAN TRIED TO SING HIS PART AND MINGHAO THREW A PILLOW AT HIM AND JOSHUA SCREECHED

 

 

 

 

lenora @galaxyvernon  
yuseul is one chaotic fucking neutral if ive ever seen one

 

 

**\---------**

 

 

 

wonwoo?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
YUSEUL JUST TOLD ME THAT MINGHAO SAID TO JUN LAST NIGHT 'i mean there arent a lot of people i would bottom for but i guess if you asked me to' LIKE I CANT BREAHTENDNJ

  
hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
im a top im a top im a top im a top im a top im a top im a t

           Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
           @stormcloudjun Doubtable

 

hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
i hate mingyu because hes too tall and he pretends to care about my feelings

           wonwoo ?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
           @stormcloudjun i do care about your feelings :(

           hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
           @kissesjihoon I ACCIDENTLY OFFERED TO BOTTOM FOR WEN JUNHUI AND YOU LAUGHED AT ME AND TWEETED ABOUT IT

           mingyu!! no!! @hamsterhoshi  
           @stormcloudjun @kissesjihoon the Horsening

           hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
           @hamsterhoshi @kissesjihoon STOP

  
lizzie @wanderingjeonghan  
i absolutely fucking hate seventeen ohmygod dont they realize junhui is a bottom HIMSELF

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
ugh work is boring xx hope i get to see my boyfriend wen junhui soon  
   
           lenora @galaxyvernon  
           @stormcloudjun i honestly cant tell if youre being serious or still just making the ironic 'my bias is my boyfriend' jokes  
   
           hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
           @galaxyvernon dw i would be a lot more hyped if i was dating jun lol im not this dumb

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
hao: boom im a genuis  
  
jun: sigh  
jun: just  
jun: just Sigh  
  
hao: smoochie

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
lets see if jun can still be my b*yfriend: does he know [the numa numa song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45MHpJOE9TU)

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
hao: junnie uwu

jun: yes?  
  
hao: Hello, Hello  
hao: It's me, Picasso  
hao: I will paint  
hao: My words of love  
hao: With your name on every wall...  
hao: ..  
hao: ..  
hao: jun  
  
jun: When you leave my colors fade to gray  
  
hao: UWU UWU AY UWU UWU AY  
  
jun: LDSKJ  
jun: EVERY WORD OF LOVE I USE TO SAY  
  
hao: NOW I PAINT THEM EVERYDAY  
  
jun: WHEN YOU LEAVE MY COLORS FADE TO GREY  
jun: HEY LITTLE LOVER STAY  
jun: OR ALL MY COLORS FADE AWAY  
  
hao: EVERY WORD OF LOVE I USE TO SAY  
hao: NOW I PAINT THEM EVERYDAY  
  
jun: did you literally fucking say uwu uwu ay for the oho a oho ay part in the numa numa song  
  
hao: :D

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
lets see if jun can still be my b*yfriend: does he know the numa numa song

            hao?¿ @stormcloudjun  
           @stormcloudjun FUCK YEAH HES STILL MY B*YFR*END

  
vanessa @ksybaby  
cant fucking stand this shit. i say i ship junhao n ppl get on my abt letting svt just have friends, i say they arent dating n ppl shove minghaos tweets in my face. a bitch cannot fucking win.

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
lizza @thighmin  
yuseul was in chans last vlog w vernon uwu guys i literally love yuseul sm <33 i never heard her actually speak english did u noticed her accent its so cute <3333333333

           rebecca @sevenateen  
           @thighmin u rly shouldnt make fun of and demean her accent when she speaks english lol

           lizza @thighmin  
           @sevenateen what

            rebecca @sevenateen  
           @thighmin yuseul is super fluent in english and its really impressive, so what if she still has an accent ?? its not her first fucking language

           lizza @thighmin  
          @sevenateen LMFAOOO WAIT WAIT NOOOOO  
   
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @thighmin @sevenateen laid ease, laid ease bls bls.. allow me to explain... i learned english from living in an english speaking country.... which was england... i have a british accent... when i speak english

           rebecca @sevenateen  
          @thighmin @hanyuseul FUJC ignore me please

 

rebecca @sevenateen  
becca getting noticed by idols & friends of idols by NOT looking stupid challenge [FAILED]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey im not gna say it a third time stan fucking vav or i will not update again IM BEING SERIOUS GO LISTEN TO SPOTLIGHT


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MT LIFE IS FALLING APART I AM SO SORRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

jihoon: hey did you want to do something today?

hot carat jun knows: yeah definetly !!  
  
jihoon: cool!! maybe jun and minghao could join us? ive been meaning to invite them sometime

 

 

  
**\----------**

 

disappointment: oh no  
disappointment: oh no  
disappointment: fuck wonwoo im gonna cry

mistake: what happened??

disappointment: jihoon just asked to hang out but he wants to bring jun and minghao??

mistake: what did you just want to be alone?

disappointment: noi just  
disappointment: jun and minghao are a couple  
disappointment: what if he thinks this is a double date  
disappointment: does he think he and i are dating?

mistake: has he ever actually asked you out?

disappointment: no but woo ur missing the big picture  
disappointment: im not gay

mistake: oh..

disappointment:  look i  
disappointment: honestly i dont fucking know what i am  
disappointment: but im scared to just  
disappointment: say that to him  
disappointment: that im not sure  
disappointment: and i dont want to lead him on  
disappointment: i like him but i dont know if i  
disappointment: like him... like that?

mistake: i get you  
mistake: but hes not going to hate you for saying youre unsure  
mistake: just talk to him

disappointment: :(

 

**\----------**

 

jihoon: hello??  
jihoon: did u die

hot carat jun knows: hyung can i ask you a question

jihoon: yeah?

hot carat jun knows: why do u wanna bring jun n minghao

jihoon: oh uh  
jihoon: jun is my broski  
jihoon: and i havent really had much of a chance to get to know minghao yknow

hot carat jun knows: is that really the only reason?

jihoon: what else would it be?

hot carat jun knows: .. well  
hot carat jun knows: jun and minghao.. are a couple  
hot carat jun knows: and like  
hot carat jun knows: an established couple + .. two other people ..

jihoon: are you trying to ask me if this would be a double date .. ?

hot carat jun knows: i mean  
hot carat jun knows: maybe?

jihoon: uh  
jihoon: uhhhh  
jihoon: wouldyousayno

hot carat jun knows: F

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
disappointment has sent an image

disappointment: FUCK

mistake: well  
mistake: would you?

disappointment: i  
disappointment: i dont think so.

mistake: well, theres your answer

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
jihoon: press f for respect .. ?

hot carat jun knows: i think i would say yes

jihoon: oh  
jihoon: so uh  
jihoon: do u  
jihoon: wanna go on a double date with me  
jihoon: and jun and minghao

hot carat jun knows: yes  
hot carat jun knows: i want to go on a date with you

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
wonwoo?? yes?? @kissesjihoon  
MY LONGEST YEAH BOY EVER

           mingers @stormcloudjun  
           @kissesjihoon HE JUST TEXTED ME !! YEAH BOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

 

mingers @stormcloudjun  
i went over to chans apartment to bother him and hes been playing vav real loudly ksdjs

chanathan @lovinghvc  
hey carat fuckers, yeah, stan vav

lenora @galaxyvernon  
the fuck is a vav

           chanathan @lovinghvc  
           @galaxyvernon oh baby geudaero isseojwo nawa du nuneul matchwojwo YOURE MY SPOTLIGHT NEON JAGEUN DIA GATA TEUKBYEOLHAN BUNWIGI SAIRO JOM DAREUN NUNBIT JABAJWO YEAH YEAH NE BICHWUL HYANGHAE SONEUL PPEODEODWA RA TA TA TA TA TA NE BICHWUL HYANGHAE SONEUL PPEODEODWA RA TA TA TA TA TA NE BICHWUL HY

          lenora @galaxyvernon  
          @lovinghvc IM SO  R YR RY

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

hao: lmfao chan jus said to me 'damn junhao goin on a double date w gyuhoon .. fuck chansol lives then?"

yuseul: LMFAOOOO  
yuseul: wait a DAMN minute  
yuseul: GYU

mingyu: hewwo

yuseul: UR GOING O NA FUCKIGN DATE WITH JIHOON?

mingyu: UHHHHYEAH

wonu: he called it a date himself im so proud

cheol: chan vav is so good wtf

chan: THANK YOU  
chan: fuck junhao and fuck gyuhoon im gna marry vernon

mingyu: date isnt until next week :( idols w/ their mf shit  
mingyu: invite me to the wedding :(

josh: me 2

chan: fuck no

josh: damn  
josh: fine gna go meet up w jeonghan  
josh: bye losers

yuseul: huh

 

  
**\----------**

 

seul: fucker

josh: yessum

seul: u n jeonghan..?

josh: ya?

seul: yall ... yknow

josh: its whatever

seul: the

josh: dont worry abt it <3

seul: UH  
seul: ok then

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

  
wonu: ok then well gyu has to come to the library w me :3

yuseul: ok furry

wonu: kill yourself

yuseul: okie dokie

mingyu: why do i have to do What

wonu: cause

mingyu: i see

wonu: i feel like going to the library but the librarian asked me once if i have any friends i took personal offense so i have to bring my ugly best friend

mingyu: ..  
mingyu: did u just call me ur best friend  
mingyu: thats the nicest thing uve ever said to me

wonu: fucker <3

mingyu: bitch <3

yuseul: im gna go bother kwan at work  
yuseul: lol bye

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
kwan is making me bubble tea :}

           kwannie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @hanyuseul its against my will

           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @makemewoozi its literally your job

 

  
**\----------**

 

  
yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
{based on a real story} junhui: yknow i love that i was born in 96 because if you switch the numbers u get 69 haha  
jihoon, soonyoung, wonwoo collectively: yeah

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul   
OH MY GOD ... 96 line more like the ninty-sexy line ...

           cheolie @vernomchewing  
           @hanyuseul i was born in 95 tho  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @vernomchewing hubba hubba ooh boyfriend 95 more like ninty-fine

 

kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
@hanyuseul what abt 98  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @makemewoozi ninty-FUCKINATE  
  
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
            @hanyuseul well idk what it was that i expected

 

  
\----------

 

  
wonu: LADS and lady  
  
yuseul: represent  
  
wonu: LADS AND LADY... MY FRIENDS  
wonu: JEON WONWOO HAS FALLEN IN LOVE..  
  
yuseul: yea w soonyoung WBK  
  
wonu: honestly i think he and seokmin r dating lmao  
  
yuseul: i already cried over this today oppa why bring it up  
yuseul: my marriage is failing .. seokmin  
yuseul: mg husband of seven years..  
  
cheol: im right here  
  
  
yuseul: bb u know ur the only one for me  
  
cheol: mwah  
  
kwan: th lovebirds  
  
wonu: WAS AT THE LIBRARY... SAW GIRL  
wonu: GIRL SO PRETTY...  
  
mingyu: she was dumb thick too  
  
kwan: damn..  
  
wonu: stop  
wonu: i got her # her name is soomi im In Love So Deeply  
  
mingyu: they talked abt harry potter for twenty minutes, he sees her carat bong sticker on her phone case  
mingyu: then wonu was like 'hey im personal friends with svt'  
  
chan: BITHCKSDJK did he rly  
  
  
wonu: mayhaps  
  
kwan: how thick r we talking  
kwan: like im thick, seok is thick, but ... th gorl  
kwan: what kinda thick  
kwan: DUMB THICK??  
kwan: WHATCHUU MEANNN  
kwan: why is nothing sending  
kwan: is it cause i let frezno drink the bath water  
  
josh: i will never get credit for that joke will i  
  
chan: no  
  
mingyu: she was Dumb Thicc like omg  
mingyu: she was in a pleaded skirt n shit too my dicks hard

wonu: .

mingyu: kidding  
mingyu: not  
mingyu: who knows  
mingyu: i dont

wonu: wahtever she wasnt impressed that i play kwon soonyoung in cup pong on the regular so idk i guess she just likes my personality

yuseul: i mean ur also hot

hao: yee yee

wonu: ok that too  
wonu: i am, how u say, charming

mingyu: shut up

wonu: bitch make me

mingyu: ya wanna fuckin go

wonu: YEAH

mingyu: ON A DATE

wonu: .

mingyu: what

wonu: brave of u to assume my standards dropped so low

mingyu: brave of me to assume u had standards to begin with  
mingyu: have u seen ur ex's

hao: SKDFMDSL  
hao: POLEASE MU SIDEKKSKs

yuseul: im WHEEIZING

cheol: she actually is  
cheol: guys she has ASTHMA

chan: oh fuq

wonu: is she ok

yuseul: I FOUDN MY INHALER WE GUCCI

wonu: f  
wonu: stop talking to seokmin

yuseul: YOU CANT MAKE ME

kwan: fun fact i got laid today

yuseul: KSlfjl

kwan: yall wanna KNOW WHAT HE SAID TO ME

yuseul: what he say

kwan: 'bro ur fucking hung'

yuseul: did  
yuseul: did he actually call u bro

kwan: yes  
kwan: still ate my ass tho

chan: tea

wonu: what did we say abt u saying that word 

kwan: rmbr i got the biggest dick here bitches

yuseul: that would be me

cheol: ngl yuseul is the definition of big dick energy

yuseul: u know it

wonu: actual penis sizes aside, who has the biggest dick

mingyu: u mean enegry wise?

wonu: yeth

mingyu: yuseul>kwan>joshua>wonwoo>chan>hao>cheol>mingyu

yuseul: damn u did urself dirty

mingyu: im a fucking loser what else do u want from me

wonu: he speak the truth

mingyu: wonwoo youre literally my best friend youre suppose to defend me

wonu: sorry but u are a pussy

mingyu: .

cheol: seul vouch for my dick

yuseul: ur hung but ur energy is Sub Bitch

cheol: damn

yuseul: mommy still rides u every night :*

josh: im WELL AWARE OF THAT ONE  
josh: yall still have my handcuffs

kwan: sigh

mingyu: please stop talking

chan: n e ways tell us more abt gorl :0

wonu: she and i texted a bit yee yee shes real cute  
wonu: i think shes interested in me but lets hope not for sex >.>

mingyu: is this a big concern

wonu: yall rmbr jaeyung

cheol: vaugely

josh: i think i fucked him last year idk  
josh: tht was the last time i saw my handcuffs..

wonu: nice  
wonu: fun fact im actually not even mad idrc good job hyung  
wonu: we were half datin n shit n then he tried to suck my dick  
wonu: and i was like  
wonu: bro i dont like that shit  
wonu: and then he was like  
wonu: wtf how r you homophobic, but you keep holding my hand  
wonu: and i was like i like boys not dick

mingyu: i like dick not boys  
mingyu: wait delet

chan: hyung?

wonu: AND I WAS LIKE  
wonu: EXPLAINIGN  
wonu: oh boy oh boy i Sure am asexual  
wonu: n he stopped texting me

yuseul: wonu :(  
yuseul: ima kick his ass  
yuseul: NAH ILL GET ALL OF NCT TO KICK HIS ASS  
yuseul: im gna scream imagine him doing his thing n then all of nct show up and beat the shit out of him  
yuseul: IMAGINE U GETTIN JUMPED N U JUST HEAR 'HE HURT UR STANS HEART KICK HIS ASS JUNGWOO'

wonu: STOPsdjkffdkj  
wonu: IMAGINE U GETTING JUMPED N U JUST HEAR 'HE SAID YOU HAVE THE SAME SMILE AS FLAWLESSKEVIN KICK HIS ASS MARK'

chan: FUCKDFKHF STOP

cheol: stop using ur connections to get ahead in life

yuseul: WHAT ELSE WOULD I USE THEM FOR

cheol: idc just get me jungwoos autograph

yuseul: UGH! fine

cheol: lmao love u bby

yuseul: i love u too :(

cheol: :(

yuseul: i miss seungcheol

josh: ur................... on his lap

cheol: i love u seul

yuseul: ilyt baby :(

wonu: disgusting. the cishettery.

mingyu: u were just talking abt a gorl

kwan: WHAT KINDA THICK WAS SHE THO

hao: will u let this die

kwan: no  
kwan: 2seung stay the thick ones

chan: um . bitch.

hao: chans ass jiggles when he dances ;(

chan: thank u so much

kwan: wtf i thought he couldnt read

 

chan has left operation: get soonyoung a flan

 

kwan: SKSDKL  
  
yuseul: YALL BETTER STOP CLOWING MY SON >:(

 

yuseul has added chan to operation: get soonyoung a flan

 

chan has left operation: get soonyoung a flan

 

yuseul: im telling vernon

kwan: oh shi

  
 

**\----------**

 

yusoup: kwan made an illiterate chan joke again n now he left the chat pls console him  
  
vernom: omg what  
  
yusoup: ONE TIME CHAN MISREAD JEONGHAN'S NAME AS JELLYBEAN AND JOSHUA STARTED A JOKE THAT CHAN COULDN'T READ AND IT'S BEEN GOING ON FOR A YEAR NOW THE CARATS THAT WATCH HIS YT CHANNEL FOUND OUT ABT IT AND CHAN IS GOING THRU IT  
  
vernom: omg

 

**\----------**

 

nonnie: so i hear u cant read

channie: STOP  
channie: LET ME SULK IN PEACE >:(

nonnie: pouty boy  
nonnie: a whole baby :(

channie: maybe :(  
channie: im coming to the dorms shut up

nonnie: F  
nonnie: okay  
nonnie: can i cuddle u

channie: yes  
channie: i want cuddles :(

nonnie: yknow they dont actually think you cant read

channie: I KNWONDIS i want them to feel bad tho :*

nonnie: skjkds come over faster :(

channie: eheehehehhe

 

**\----------**

 

chananthan @lovinghvc  
guess where i am BITCHES

  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @lovinghvc pls come home ur father and i are so worried  
  
           chanathan @lovinghvc  
           @hanyuseul omg im literally the only one that lives on my own   
  
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @lovinghvc @hanyuseul wtf am i  
            
           chananthan @lovinghvc  
           @makemewoozi u literally live with cheolseulshua

          

   
kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
im the only one that CLEANS ANYTHING IN MY FUCKING APARTMENT SO I MIGHT AS WELL LIVE ON MY OWN  
   
          yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
          @makemewoozi 3/4 of yr rent is just magically paid for every month  
  
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @hanyuseul delete this  
   
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @makemewoozi :*

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
if ur mom pays ur rent u gotta put it in ur bio  
  
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @hanyuseul fuck you?? fuck you.  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @makemewoozi fuck me :*

 

  
chanathan @lovinghvc  
no one guessed right so ill just say it: i broke into svts dorms im in vernons bed  
  
           alyssa @pledistan  
           @lovinghvc i knew i followed at least one saesang

 

chanathan @lovinghvc  
guys Blease im kidding he invited me over to cuddle :( yall know we friends now n shit  
  
           may @sythnm  
           @lovinghvc thats gay?? thats gay.

  
  
Vernon Chwe ✓ retweeted with: <3  
  
chanathan @lovinghvc  
ugh vernon is such a softie :( hes a nice cuddle puddle

 

 

alec @junbug  
im sorry Vernon Retweeted What

 

 

**\----------**

 

  
chan: hyung  
chan: hyung  
chan: hyung  
  
hao: wh  
  
chan: HYUNG  
  
hao: wtf stop it  
  
chan: UHHH THINGS HAPPENED  
  
hao: did u learn to read  
  
chan: did u learn how to speak korean  
  
hao: did u learn how to speak mandarin  
  
chan: fuck u  
chan: THINGS HAPPENED THO  
  
hao: u spooned vernon ik i follow u on twt  
  
hao: stan twt all up in arms cause vern rt'd u  
  
chan: I KISSED HIM  
  
hao: the fuck

 

  
**\----------**

 

 

mingers @stormcloudjun  
im sorry The Fuck  


mingers @stormcloudjun  
DID HE JUST LEAVE ME ON READ  
  
           alyssa @pledistan  
           @stormcloudjun i bet it was jun  
  
           Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
           @stormcloudjun @pledistan I didn't leave Minghao on read?? I'm waiting for him to send 8ball back??

  
  
  
alyssa @pledistan  
DID JUNHUI JUST RESPOND TO ME

           Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
           @pledistan Yes

           Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
           @pledistan Tell Minghao to send 8ball back

 

Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
The8 ball

 

**\----------**

 

hao: BITCH

chan: SORRY I WAS HIDING

hao: what

chan: idk nonnie left for the bathroom n jeonghannie hyung came into his room n i ?? panicked and hid under the bed

hao: nonnie ??? /pet names ??/ /f eaht the FUCK CHANSOL

chan: omg .. we have sucha cute ship name ..

hao: omg  
hao: u gay fool

chan: yes yes i know  
chan: n e ways I KISSED VERNON AND HE GIGGLED

hao: bitch spill  
  
chan: im telling u bc u n nonnie r the only people in my life who will defend my ass  
chan: well we were spooning n it was soft as shit like hes so .. warm

hao: omg

chan: n i rested my head on his shoulder and he was so so cute

hao: wait ur the big spoon?  
hao: im shocked?? confused?? afraid?? a little aroused??

chan: ksdjfh shut up  
chan: YES IM THE BIG SPOON vernon said he prefers to be the lil spoon :(

hao: gay??? gay?? gay.  
hao: i #hate being the lil spoon  
hao: jun likes it tho nicenice  
hao: tbh it just seems sweaty and terrible idk why he likes it  
hao: said it makes him feel small  
hao: gosh my bf is cute

chan: anways  
chan: n then he flipped onto his back bc we were talking n i was like.. hovering over him  
chan: n he was so cute..  
chan: and i leaned in a bit  
chan: n he was looking up to me  
chan: his eyes are full of stars  
chan: he looked so fucking beautiful and then he tilted his head a bit and just nodded  
chan: so i kissed him  
chan: and he giggled and said 'do it again'  
chan: and then we kissed for a bit and my heart was beating so so so fast hyung  
chan: then he was like "uhhHhhHHH i gotta use the bathroom" cause he got a fucking boner  
chan: and kjdfs im highly considering running away or kissing him again when he comes back

hao: sorry im just  
hao: save the shit u said abt dicks  
hao: that ?? was the cutest thing ?? ive EVER HEARD??  
hao: brb screenshotting and sending to vern

chan: no... dont..

hao: do u rly not care

chan: ill pretend like im embarrased if he asks but  
chan: im too nervous to tell him this stuff ?? but i want him to know i think it

hao: so cute  
hao: soooo cute  
hao: oh boy youreWHIPPED

chan: omg you literally held junnie hyungs hand

hao: and????????

chan: GAY

hao: VERY  
hao: chan hes my boyfriend  
hao: please kiss vernon when he gets back and tell him the stars thing

chan: ok kjdsj  
chan: i hope hes my bf now

hao: ask him  
hao: legit ask him he'll say yes and minghao will cry

chan: OH BOY!

 

**\----------**

 

chanathan @lovinghvc  
my @ makes SOOO much more sense now  
   
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @lovinghvc putain de salaud.. qu'as-tu fait..

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
chan got seungkwan texting me 'how do u curse someone out in french' BITCH JUST DO IT IN KRN OMG   
  
           kwanie ~ <3 @makemewoozi  
           @hanyuseul i do what i want

 

  
Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
@stormcloudjun Send 8ball back

**\----------**

 

seokseok: He visits my town once a year.  
seokseok: He fills my mouth with kisses and nectar.  
seokseok: I spend all my money on him

seulseul: .

seokseok: its a mango


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **mentions of sexual assult**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who is back back again tell a friend 
> 
> my life still lowkey fallin apart but hey i m gna clean my room and flex on u bitches mental health is gna **F L E X**

 chanthan @lovinghvc  
vern jus said to me 'where tf u think u going with all of that ass' im going home is where im going fucker

 

           Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew  
           @lovinghvc I'm Sorry

           Vernon Chwe ✓ @chwenotchew   
          @lovinghvc Cause you're my home, home, home <3

 

 

vanessa @ksybaby  
u ever see sum of the shit chan tweets abt vern n wanna literally throw fuckin hands with him bc i do

 

mingers @stormcloudjun  
man fuck ChanSol lives ..  
  

 

**\----------**

 

chan: the fuck did vernon and i do to offend minghao so much im literally throwing hands

yuseul: ur hands r soft tho  
yuseul: feel like cotton balls when u punchy punch

chan: shut up >:(  
chan: noona got boney fist that feel like knives when she punch

kwan: she'll kill me one day i stg

yuseul: arent u at work

kwan: i leave in like five minutes  
  
yuseul: bring me sum bubble tea :3  
  
josh: me 2  
josh: i want th bubbles  
josh: cronch  
  
kwan: i literally hate u both do u want pearl milk tea

josh: lychee plz  
josh: why does minghao hate chansol yall cute

chan: hes jealous hes not the only idolxreader boy anymore

josh: y/n out here living his dream life

yuseul: "i walked outside my house with a messy bun and legging today without any makeup and saw jun from seventeen. he smiled at me and gave me his number. we are going to fuck."

kwan: see ik that minghao just trimmed his fucking mullet but imagine him putting that mullet in a messy bun

yuseul: im gna buy him leggings and steal all his makeup

josh: we love y/n

cheol: mullet bitch

gyu: yall woozi is cute im sad  
gyu: oh we're making fun of minghao LEGGO  
gyu: fun fact he was actually jacking off whenever he said he was while listening to call x3

yuseul: no one is surprised y/n wild

hao: i come here and see nothing but minghao slander  
hao: yuseul literally shut up you work at fuckign sm entertainment and do fucking kyungsoo (and jongdae i dont give a fuck what ANY of you say he has UWU eyes when she walks into the room) has a crush on you YOU'RE LITERALLY Y/N

yuseul: LKSJD  
yuseul: YOURE LITERALLY DATIGN YOUR ULT CAN YOU SHUTU PSDJDSJKLDSKL  
yuseul: AFTER HE FOLLOWED U ON TWITTER IM WHEEZINFKSDJKD

cheol: hun u got ur inhaler

yuseul: jus cos i said im wheezing doesnt always mean i got an asthma attack u fool

cheol: u worry me

yuseul: im gna go make fun of u on twitter

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
whenever i use the phrase 'im wheezing' while laughing seungcheolie literally always thinks im having an asthma attack HONEY ITS NTB  
  
            cheolie @vernomchewing  
            @hanyuseul hpw dare u expose me for being a caring boyfriend  
  
            yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @vernomchewing u can expose me for something

 

cheolie @vernomchewing  
uhhhhone time yuseul wanted to sub  
  
            yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @vernomchewing THIS IS LITERALLY NOT WHAT I MEANT AT ALL SKJDJSDJ IM SCREAMIGN HONEY PELASKEWJDSLSDL  
  
             cheolie @vernomchewing  
            @hanyuseul I COULDNT HTINK OF ANYTHIGN ELSE

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
STOP RETWEETING SEUNGCHEOL IM ACTUALLY SO SCARE SM ARTISTS WILL SEE I WILL LITERALLY QUIT MY FUCKING JOB  
  
           JAEHYUN ✓ @NCT_JAEHYUN  
           @hanyuseul Isn't his Twitter @/vernomchewing ?  
  
            yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @NCT_JAEHYUN im literally not going to answer that  
  
           JAEHYUN ✓ @NCT_JAEHYUN  
           @hanyuseul I will literally just ask Seokmin

 

JAEHYUN ✓ @NCT_JAEHYUN  
Wow Noona that's crazy, that's wild  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @NCT_JAEHYUN i be like: calling human resouces noises  
  
           JAEHYUN ✓ @NCT_JAEHYUN  
           @hanyuseul Now hang on there--

 

jess @taeyongsmullet  
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOES ON WITH JAEHYUNS TWITTER EWKDSLDS

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
hey i just wanted to say for future reference that if u ever watch a video or sumn and a kpop boy says dirty n ur like 'wow he accidently said this omg does he even realize' it wasnt a fucking accident and he will do it again  
  
           yuseul ✓ @hanyuseul  
           @hanyuseul half of the relevent idols ik are all inbetween 17-25 do u honestly think they dont know what jacking of is or sumn

 

mingers @stormclubjun  
im sad but good to me is playing so ill just miss jun while bopping my head to the beat  
  
           mingers @stormcloudjun  
           @stormcloudjun it's like, me: crying   good to me: starts playing  me, crying: ayayay..

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

junnie: i know i shouldnt be making fun of this but like  
junnie: im just imagining u actually sobbing and doing the good to me choreo

hao: pls

 

**\----------**

 

 

mingers @stormcloudjun  
i take it back i dont miss that hoe  
  
           Wen Junhui ✓ @junhui_1996  
           @stormcloudjun :( Can I hug u?  
   
          mingers @stormcloudjun  
           @junhui_1996 don't u dare touch me with ur brokeass hands

 

chanathan @lovinghvc  
@stormcloudjun omg what did jun even do

           mingers @stormcloudjun  
           @lovinghvc nothing that ur chansol ass needs to know

           chanthan @lovinghvc  
          @stormcloudjun BITCH I LITERALLY BREATHED WHAT THE FUCK GOES ON HYUNG

           mingers @stormcloudjun  
           @lovinghvc idk what good it would do to tweet it to u, u cant even read

 

chanathan @lovinghvc  
yall imnot even kidding i need 2 be held back rn MINGHAO I KNOW WHERE YOUR SKINNY ASS LIVES

           mingers @stormcloudjun  
           @lovinghvc U THINK IM AFRAID TO DIE? GOD DOESNT SCARE ME.

 

mingyuwu @kissesjihoon  
minghao gets moody when he's horny pls dont take any of his salt too seriously

           mingers @stormcloudjun  
           @kissesjihoon u think im salty? bitch im marinating

           mingyuwu @kissesjihoon  
           @stormcloudjun just go watch call call call and beat your dick off

 

mingyuwu @kissesjihoon  
minghao literally out here pretending like i cant rock his shit

 

mingyuwu @kissesjihoon  
minghao stealing my lotion bc he jerks off so often the skin comin off

           mingyu!? no!! @hamsterhoshi  
           @kissesjihoon 'would u still love me if i had no skin' headass

           mingyu!? no!! @hamsterhoshi  
           @kissesjihoon bro wtf u changed ur display w/o telling me :(

 

wonuwu @hamsterhoshi  
when i say men are trash im only talking about mingyu  
  
           Lee Jihoon ✓ @woozi96  
           @woozi96 mood

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

junnie: ʳ ᵘ ʰᵒʳⁿʸ

hao: h  
hao: maybe..  
hao: uhhhhhwhat of it

junnie: i mean like im ur bf  
junnie: ᵃⁿᵈ ᶦ ᵍᶦᵛᵉ ᵍᵒᵒᵈ ʰᵉᵃᵈ

hao: ᵗʰᵃᵗˢ ᵐᵃᵏᶦⁿᵍ ᵐᵉ ʰᵃʳᵈ ˢᵗᵒᵖ ᶦᵗ

junnie: ᵘʷᵘ ᵗᵉˣᵗ ᵐᵃᵏᵉˢ ᵘʳ ᵈᶦᶜᵏ ʰᵃʳᵈˀ

hao: no thinking of u ˢᵘᶜᵏᶦⁿᵍ ᵒⁿ ᵐʸ ᵈᶦᶜᵏ does

junnie: ˢᵐᵃˡˡ ᵃˢˢ ᵈᶦᶜᵏ

hao: and what of it  
hao: can i ask smth tho..

junnie: yea?

hao: so like arnd when we got together u said sumn like  
hao: 'i dont want to have sex for my own reasons'  
hao: n considering now u asking to put my balls in ur mouth  
hao: what... were those reasons?

junnie: babe it'll kill the mood im literally gna be omw in ten

hao: :/

junnie: h  
junnie: look ive had time to process stuff so im good now and i swear if i want to stop i will  
junnie: u aint gotta worry  
junnie: ive been celibate for like three years im bein honest  
junnie: only reason i was unsure b4 was cos i knew u but didnt rly Know Know u  
junnie: it was a trust thing  
junnie: n its been three months lol

hao: :/  
hao: okayy  
hao: can i suck u off too :(

junnie: we'll see :* gtg see u in a bit

hao: okiee

junnie: no touching urself, boxers  only when i get there :p

hao: f word

 

**\----------**

 

 

  
myungho: are either of u home

wonuwu: im hanging out with yuseul  
wonuwu: word -yuseul

myungho: omg shes not allowed to see the phone

wonuwu: BITCH WHY -yuseul

myungho: BC ITS EMBARRASING AND I BARELY WANT THESE FUCKERS TO SEE

gyuboo: im at work but im abt to be #gone  
gyuboo: hewwo tho

myungho: ok good dont come home for like ᵃⁿ ʰᵒᵘʳˀ ᶦᵈᵏ

wonuwu: >.> why

myungho: hah not tellin now

gyuboo: oh u know his ass is getting tapped

myungho: shutup

gyuboo: AM I RIGHT

myungho: SHUTUP

wonuwu: yuseul is laughing  
wonuwu: this is awful we're in the middle of starbucks and she's cryin

gyuboo: my starbucks?

wonuwu: yea

gyuboo: omg

myungho: ok while u guys Chill im gna suck wen junhuis dick

gyuboo: update us

myungho: arent u straight

gyuboo: like 73.3% straight  
gyuboo: it keeps going down everytime i hang out with jihoon

 

 

  
**\----------**

 

 

  
flan bringer: hey so jun left ? for the day right?

hamster cheeks: yeah! we finished choreo practiced p early

flan bringer: oh nice :) im out with yuseul and mingyu rn, did u maybe want to join? we bouta get froyo

hamster cheeks: ohh :( i rly want to but seokmin and i have plans <33 im sorry <33

flan bringer: oh thats fine !! dw abt it

hamster cheeks: r u sure :(

flan bringer: yeah !! pls dont worry

hamster cheeks: if u guys will be out later seokmin and i are getting bbq with his cousin if u guys wanna join ?

flan bringer: okay :) sounds nice

hamster cheeks: ill send u the location arnd 6 ish, it's not too far frm pledis

flan bringer: uwu

 

**\----------**

 

 

wonu: big sigh

yuseul: ur literally out with me n gyu rn why are u sighin

wonu: why text me n not speak the words  
wonu: verbally

yuseul: would u of paid attention

wonu: prolly not  
wonu: :/ i invited soonyoung to join us and he had sumn with seokmin  
wonu: hhh im pretty sure theyre dating and it just kinda :/

josh: yea tbh i think they are too  
josh: which,, ik why theyre weary to tell Us cos what if we suddenly have a fallin out and then we jus out here knowing all their personal bullshit

chan: i won the rights to like seven of their songs they aint allowed to leave us

josh: ok but realistically, u get why

chan: yeah ofc  
chan: hyung do u like soonyoung hyung?

wonu: :( kinda  
wonu: lmao i already kind of accept people dont want to be with me cos they all assume i wont put out but yk

yuseul: honestly i think if seokmin and soonyoung oppa werent together he would be at least a lil into u

wonu: pls dont get my hopes up ://

chan: its dumb that people reply so much on sex in a relationship

wonu: like jus cos im asexual doesnt mean i havent Had sex  
wonu: in some ways i kinda think itslike ?? i only know im Willing to should i be in a trusting relationship with the person and its completely my choice  
wonu: in simpler terms, i dont want to have sex but i will if its for my partners enjoyment or benefit  
wonu: like ive sucked a dick before and then i played legend of zelda what the fuck of it

yuseul: im sorry not to laugh to u but like  
yuseul: that entire sentence

chan: where was that sentence when i graduated highschool  
chan: yearbook quote YEET

wonu: my new legacy  
wonu: yh but like  
wonu: idk . soonyoung doesnt like me (lol) and im either a shitty man or a shitty asexual

yuseul: explain

wonu: everyone assumes men Love sex and only want Sex and will do anything for Sex and (spoiler) i dont  
wonu: second one is, im not sex-repulsed and likeeee every asexual ive ever met as been sex replused so when ive mentioned ive had sexual encounters before theyre like "oh so ur... not rly asexual"

yuseul: virgin losers

wonu: Word  
wonu: its just Super Fucking annoyinh is all  
wonu: oh btw seul & gyu i agreed for us to meet up with seoksoon and seoks cousin for dinner

yuseul: eye  
yuseul: aight then

mingyu: im buying a new shirt for it

yuseul: aight then  
yuseul: omw to help u

hao: yall can cum home now

yuseul was that spelling on purpose

hao: Perhaps

 

 

**\----------**

 

 

gyuboo: details.

myungho: omg  
myungho: he sucked my dick and we spooned and then like  
myungho: hehehehe

gyuboo: skldfksd what happened

myungho: .. we were spooning right

wonuwu: yh

myungho: n like  
myungho: he got hard  
myungho: he like

wonuwu: ??

myungho: h-he fucked my thighs frm behind  
myungho: i nutted twice :(  
myungho: AND  i got a hickey

gyuboo: LMAOOO

wonuwu: what thighs

gyuboo: KJSDFJKD

myungho: hyung u literally look like a stick figure please dont  
myungho: shut up he made the prettiest noises im sad  
myungho: we talked after abt stuff too

gyuboo: like?

myungho: nothin'

gyuboo: aight then

myungho: yknow the fact that hes been my celeb crush the past idk years and now i just got a blowjob frm him life rly is wild  
myungho: not kidding when i say i had my head tilted back whilehe was Suckin n when i looked down and saw Wen Jun Hui with his mouth arnd my dick and i ACTUALLY NUTTED IMMEDIATELY BC WEN JUNHUI WAS BLOWING ME

wonuwu: thats crazy thats wild

myungho: im literally so sad he sounded so pretty wtf @jun come over

wonuwu: did he literally come and leave after yall hooked up

myungho: i ain't nothing but a 2 cent horre

gyuboo: horre

myungho: yessum

 

 

****----------****

 

 

jun: hey uh  
jun: i told minghao abt  
jun: 2016  
  
seokie: oh?  
seokie: like  
seokie: everything?

jun: yeah and  
jun: i like feel a huge relief but im also feeling really sick  
jun: highkey went over to his place to suck his dick

seokie: omf

jun: n lik ?? i did n i alrdy told him before hand If I Didnt Want To Continue I Would Stop  
jun: n like

jihoon: take your time

jun: i was alright yknow? the whole time even after ~his stuff~ i got.. sum fuk

seokie: u mean like Fuck or jus fuk

jun: i fukced his thighs n jacked him off idk what u mean  
jun: but we was jus laying there after, cuddling

soonyoung: and you were okay with all of it?

jun: yeah, yeah

vernon: and everything he did? that was okay?

jun: yeah completely  
jun: minghao was hesitant before i even got there cos i had said to him beforehand that i would take a bit

soonyoung: iwas gna say 3 months is a bit rushed then i remember seokmin and i fucked three weeks after we met so

jun: KDSSDKJ i mean--  
jun: minghao is rly so sweet tho he was very patient with me

soonyoung: i trusted hes a good guy and im just glad i was right

jihoon: yh even tho i could order a walking tree to kill him if need be

jun: ngl i think minghao can and will kill mingyu

jihoon: ok.. yh

jun: but then after he was like "u know i dont date u cause... i want to fuck you, right?"

seokie: that was  
seokie: awkwardly worded

jun: yeah..  
jun: then he was like "i mean. i do ? want to fuck you.. but like, its not all i see this as... im sexually attracted to you but thats not the only thing im getting out of this yknow?"  
jun: "so if u dont want to do this again or sumn. like, ever again or just for a lil while, it's alright, its okay."

soonyoung: nice save hao

jun: and :(( minghao started tellign me all the things he loves abt me and it was so soft n so sweet im gonna cry :((

jihoon: awe :((

vernon: this is sweet

jun: so anyway we were snuggling n then iwas like "do u wanna know why i dont.. want to do this stuff?"  and he said as long as im totally comfortable he does want to know, but if im uncomfortable then he can wait  
jun: so i just told him. everything. about the guy. and he just held my hand and listened.

vernon: are u okay?

jun: yeah im just  
jun: a little shooken

vernon: but minghao was cool?

jun: he was mad abt the guy  
jun: he does that thing where he mumbles stuff like 'what the fuck' over and over and says terrible things abt the guy, to show u how much is disgusts him and how much he cares  
jun: minghao is a tender person  
jun: just the right amount ygm  
jun: he overwhelms me just enough to excite me  
jun: im really glad i met him

 

 

****----------****

 

 

 

wonu: hey we're gna be out the rest of the night ish idk how long rly

chan: oki hyung have fun!!!!!

wonu: no offense chan but i was talking to like  
wonu: The Roomates

chan: i see so you guys are disciminating against me

josh: the illiterate

chan: the joke IS NOT FUNNY ANY MORE

yuseul: *john mulaney voice* NOT FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

josh: I WAS ABT T OSEND A GIFDDKSL

yuseul: BITCH I LOVE JOHN MULANYE JKSDSDKJ  
yuseul: oof seok jus texted me they here we bouta eat good !

cheol: arent u meeting seokmins cousin too?

yuseul: yea i think shes the same age as soonyoung oppa tho  
yuseul: heheheheunnie

cheol: gay

yuseul: ur gay

kwan: fuckin homos, the lot of ye

**\----------**

wonuwu @hamsterhoshi  
oh y m fuckci n    god

**\----------**

wonu: im hiding in the bathroom

chan: can i ask

wonu: yall rmbr awhile ago i met a pretty girl at the library and got them digits

chan: yeah?

wonu: well like we didnt talk for awhile n ijust figured it was how it be  
wonu: shes seokmins cousin im crying actual fucking tears 

cheol: oh my god

wonu: mingyu laughed at me and im gna throw up  
wonu: SHES SEOKMINS FUCKIGN COUSIN SKJDFDKJS

hao: LMAO  
hao: STUPID HET

wonu: PLEAS  
wonu: IL ITERALL YBRAGGED TO HER ABOUT KNOWING HER COUSISNSDKJJFDKD  
wonu: PLEASE KIL ME NOW

yuseul: soomi unnie asked where u went

wonu: im hanging myself in the bathroom

yuseul: if ur not back in 5 im telling her ur jerking off

wonu: ..  
wonu: omw Whore

yuseul:  :p

**\----------**

 

 

chanathan @lovinghvc  
bouta post a tag video i did with vernon, perhaps we expose that hes a furry in it. stay tuned bitches.

**Author's Note:**

> lmfao okay so basically i was on the bus to work and i was like "i wonder how different my au would be had I made the idols the stans and the stans the idols. i wonder if anyone would want to see that." 
> 
> this aint gonna be long tho ily


End file.
